Help Quique the Debauched Argentinian Head Find a Body.
Yours might very well do.
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Dude Takes Viagra Before Commercial Shoot We're not really in love with this second outing for the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy and Unplanned Parenthood in which a Viagra commercial shoot is spoofed. It's just not that funny. Maybe it's because it's Advertising Week and we're expecting greatness. Oh wait. Advertising greatness? The two words don't even belong in the same sentence. Sorry about that. Well anyway. Here it is. I Pledge Allegiance to My Boobs OK so that headline is a near rip-off from Agency Spy but there aren't many ways to encapsulate the content of this new commercial for the Susan G. Komen breast cancer organization. In the commercial, we see shot after shot of women cupping their breasts as they pledge allegiance to their girls, hooters, tatas and gazongas. Yes, the American Pledge of Allegiance has been re-written as a boob joke. A book joke for a good cause, of course. Yes. Shoes Can Give Your Feet An Orgasm. Why should your feet be left out of the fun? Buy them some Bianco Footwear and give them an organs. Yes. Seriously. According to this commercial, Bianco Footwear will, indeed, give your feet an orgasm. My Life Sucks! Mask Me You Nasty Nurse! We have absolutely no idea what this commercial is for but...oh wait...it's for medical company Draeger AG but still. So they make medical and safety equipment but the concept of this ad escapes our simple mind. Yea, we get that a guy's having a wonderful fantasy while under some kind of drug and he wants more of the drug when a nasty nurse attempts to remove the mask from his face as he lies in a hospital bed but what exactly are they trying to sell here? Dragaer delivers great drugs? Great drugs create great hallucinations? Nurses are nasty? Men in puffy organ-shaped costumes always get the hot girls? Inhaling gives you a LIfestyles of the Rich and Famous sort of life? We are at a loss. Please help us. Ad Hypes American Football. We Think. This new ad from McCann Erikson Duddeldorf for the Dusseldorf Panthers borders on gross but hey, it's advertising and we like things that are different. And this is different. We're not quite sure how it actually promotes football...uh American football...as in NOT soccer...which...is actually called football in Germany. Confused? We were too for a minute. OK so the ball in the guys arm is clearly not round which is the point the ad tries to make. As in American football...not European football...as in NOT soccer...as in the game where grown men collide with each other on purpose in order to move a ball down the field. Oh that's so Neanderthal compared to the ever so graceful soccer...uh football. Oops, that would be American soccer. Wait, what? Football? Soccer/ We are so confused. Hey Wait. Aren't Hunger Drives Supposed to Feed People? OK so how do you raise money for the hungry? You spend a lot of money erecting tables and 200,000 place settings. And rather than actually feed 200,000 people, you just use the whole thing as a fund raising stunt which, in and of itself, isn't a bad thing. It just might have been a bit nicer to actually feed the hungry as well as call attention to their plight. The stunt comes from Y&R Israel. It's for the Charity Organization and consisted of 1.3 kilometers of empty dinner table. Where's the beef? Move Over P Diddy, Dan Aykroyd's Spirits Have Spirits.
 Sorry Sean, Dan's talking about both kinds of spirits and I'm not missing this. It began as an innocuous enough of a PR announcement: Until you Googled Crystal Head Vodka. How do you not love this guy after watching him talk about spirits? (8 min clip below.) Looking back, the UFO doc sure makes sense now. And the $49.99 pricetag? Genius! People always pay more for the paranormal. Guy Proposes to Girlfriend with Online 'Engagement' Ad. Impressive if a little in-your-face. With help from SheKnows, Deep Focus and VideoEgg, NYC-based creative producer Fred Ehrhard used video banner ads, a Diggable top-10 list and Twitter hashtags to convince his girlfriend to marry him. In the event that you want to help the stalwart Fred along, use the hashtag #sayyesD to tell Delila, the girl in question, why she should weld her life to his FOREVAH. Handy-dandy twitter search, however, has informed us that she's accepted, so now y'all can stop stressing about the additional work that's been imposed on the hive mind. Wondering if this is the last we'll hear about Delila and Fred. Probably not. We can see the Caturday headlines now: IM IN UR SOCNETS, ARRANGING UR MARRIAGE! Non-Prof Mails Change in Hopes of Getting Some We all get save-the-kids! mailers, and most of us have received the kind with the nickel or the quarter enclosed, for added effect. But it never occurred to us how stupid this approach is until The Denver Egotist pointed it out:
For those of us that have already passed precious shekels to a charity, it really leaves you wondering how much of that cash was recycled as nickels for the trash heap. But who knows, maybe this works, and we've been doing ourselves a great disservice by hoarding for retirement. What's that proverb? It takes money to make money? 
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