Car Salesman Gets Shut Down in Ad But Keeps Camera Rolling

This one's been making the rounds this week. If you're sick of screaming car salesman ads, you'll love this "Top Gun Motors" commercial with Ted "The Iceman" Jackson screaming insanely as car dealers do until...well, just watch the video.

Alluring Blond, Radioactive Soda Can Tease Chicagoans

Flickr user 0595 (now that's original) found this billboard in Chicago near Fullerton and the Kennedy Expressway ans hasn't a clue what it's for. Neither do we but we thought it was interesting enough and some of you might want to prove how much you know about this business by figuring out who it's for.

Independent Healthcare Not Up on Star Trek Trivia

Adland has an image of a Buffalo-based Independent Health billboard which reads, You Deserve the RedShirt Treatment which, apparently, refers to the company's red shirted staff. It's a fairly innocuous headline until you realize the definition for Red Shirt, according to Wikipedia, is "A redshirt is a stock character, used frequently in science fiction but also in other genres, whose purpose is to die soon after being introduced, thus indicating the dangerous circumstances faced by the main characters. The term comes from the science fiction television series Star Trek, in which security officers wear red shirts and are often killed on missions under the aforementioned circumstances." Oops. Of course, not that many people passing this billboard would actually know that so guess it's all good.

Beef Curtains Served With Man Sandwich and Cream Pie

Well since there's apparent surprise we haven't yet seen this cheeky New Zealand spot for Sky Television's Fresh TV, an adult channel, we're happy to oblige anyone who's confuzzled as to why we, contrary to popular belief, don't have spies in every agency in every country around the world. So here it is. During it's 1:10 length, it contains more metaphors and sexual innuendo than we'd dare say you'd find on Adrants in a year. Or maybe a month., OK, a week but still. We particularly like "beef curtains."

Give it a watch. It comes courtesy of DDB New Zealand. See how many metaphors you can spot. There's an accompanying website but it seems it's too filthy and there's only a "Be Back Soon" image.

Exceptional Sheep-Counter? A Career Awaits!

There's something for everybody out there. And if it so happens that you have high levels of physical fitness, exceptional sheep counting abilities and work dogs handy, you may be looking at a future as Stockman (yes! Capital S!) with T&R Pastoral.

The "permanent afternoon shift" is advertised in this classified, fresh out of Australia. It might be that the trickiest part of the job will be conducting the rigorous daily count without finding yourself lulled to sleep.

Who says the print ad is dead?

Talking Brain Explains Financial Aid For College

This is your brain on drugs. No, wait. This is your brain on student loans. No, there's no brain frying in a fry pan but this new commercial for Think Financial gets cute with a talking brain that explains how easy it is to get financial aid for college. Adrants reader Lisa, who was kind enough to send us this oddity remarked, "The brain itself looked like a squishy Nerf football or worse yet a female body part." Eew. But she's kinda right.

Lap-Band Solves Obesity Issue

Maybe if McDonald's and Burger King offered a free Lap-Band with every Happy Meal or Whopper, the legislature and the ad industry wouldn't have to go head to head on this whole obesity thing. After all, if the food can't get in, the kid can't get fat.

Meth Will Indeed Give You the Cleanest House on the Street

In a way, it's the job of a PSA to cut through all the glitzy ad noise and deliver a more crucial message - one that protects families from abuse, unprotected sex or drugs, for example.

But on their noble mission to maintain the status quo, sometimes an overzealous PSA can just scare the shit out of some of us, and completely confuse everyone else.

This musical meth ad first appeared over 10 years ago (we're guessing). We were terrified of it as kids. (Consider the nightmarish effects Requiem for a Dream might have had on impressionable teenagers, then compress it into a :30 spot.)

The ad came up in conversation yesterday with our landlord, who was in the middle of a cleaning spree. He remembered the ad immediately - then, perplexed, said, "It was about meth? You mean the drug?"

"Uh, yeah," we answered, to which he exclaimed, "Oh my god! All this time I thought it was about a cleaning agent."

Long pause.

He somberly added, "The commercial didn't really make me want to buy it, though."

Language Barrier Causes Alien Attack

At first, we were ready to cast aside this little online "game" for Steape Travel Translators but the more we clicked, the more we laughed. Who knew French dining could be so humorous? Who knew translation was so important to getting a good meal? Who knew ordering desert could result in an alien attack? Indeed.

Cars, Money, Friendship, Bling, Travel Applied Directly to Forehead

Chris Thomas has the story of multi-level marketer BeautiControl, a music video the company created, apparently, to motivate its consultants and the backlash caused by what Thomas describes as "horrible marketing." The video, much like that "apply directly to the forehead" commercial, features six stiletto-wearing, wannabe bootylicious primpsters dancing, posing and rapping "cars, money, friendship, bling and travel" over and over. In reaction to consultants' complaints, the company removed the video from its YouTube channel but Thomas was kind enough to capture it for us so we can all wallow in its horrific beauty.