Ladies, Wonderbra Wants Your Boobs. But Only If They're Big

To promote its new collection of D to G cup sized bras, Wonderbra is looking for 1,000 women to take part in a photoshoot on June 28 and has created a video to build interest. The video consists of a collection of metaphors for breasts such as watermelons, coconuts, puppies, pillows, knockers, cupcakes and more. The video will be distributed with hopes it will spread like this one's beginning to.

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'Get Smart' Whored, Mommy Scolds McCain, Man Conceives Soda, Jack Hits the Track

- matrixx pulls a fast one: to score coverage for a cross-promotion between Vespa, Subway and Get Smart, it produced a write-up for us. "Please do feel free to use or rewrite the whole thing," the matrixx rep said generously. What a nifty guy. And here we were thinking we had jobs to do.

- David and Goliath put together Jack's Track, a racing game that makes the most of Jack Daniel's NASCAR sponsorship.

- MoveOn says this anti-McCain ad is its most effective ad EVAR. It involves a baby. Meh.

- Bun in the oven? Learn how to troubleshoot.

- What a strange way to market a cola. I'm disgusted. But also sold.

Kazan Dabs Cultural Pen with CGI-Heavy Palette

Imagine if Ghost Writer made friends with Cirque de Soleil, and then they went on a Russian tour with hula hoops, tennis racquets and Day-Glo underpants.

Got all that? Good. You're probably picturing Kazan Celebration, which starts out enigmatic, quietly lovely and culturally reverent. Then there's this explosion of acrobats and enthralled villagers similar to the Mystere Las Vegas show.

The piece was put together by Adore Creative, which helped Kazan win a bid at the 2013 Summer Universiade (which Adore calls "the second biggest sporting event in the world after the Olympics"). Also see World of Kazan, where an English-speaking narrator depicts Kazan as a fairy-tale locale.

That's cool and all. But does it have Lotus toilet paper?

Funerals Need Not Be Boring Says MyWonderfulLife

Who said funeral have to be boring, weepy events that continuously follow the same routine? Not MyWonderfulLife, a newish online funeral planning service where people can make their funeral wishes known ahead of time and make it easy for those left planning the funeral with guidance as to what kind of funeral the person prefers.

A new commercial celebrates this so-it-yourself approach making it clear anything can happen at a funeral.

Enlarged Ego? Patchy Facial Hair? Plain Awkward? Adrantsarax May Be Right for You

This is awesome!

For client Cedra, Door Number 3/Austin put together Get Your Drug On. It confirms a suspicion we've had for years: that making a drug, or at least the ads for a drug, is as easy as Mad Libs.

Also, gotta love that waiting room music.

Twix Tears One Out of the 'Choose Your Own Adventure' Playbook

Remember those Choose Your Own Adventure books that pretty much let you decide whether you'd die two, or twenty, pages into the story? Visit Twix.com for a grown-man version of the game. You won't get to ride any unicorns, but if you're lucky, you might get to ride something else.

The adventure is called "Get the Girl." The protagonist convinces a girl to come home with him by inviting her over to blog about the media. (That gets me every time.) But there are obstacles! Mull your options over with Twix. (Helpful hint: at the very end, pick "Be honest." You'll dig what happens.)

Accompanying spot: "Oh, blogging! I love blogging!"

Trojan Vibrating Touch to Solve Ad Conference Boredom

Oh look! Trojan really does care how women feel during sex. Oh sure, they make all kinds of ribbed condoms and stuff but if a lady's man can't last long enough for all that ribbed goodness to do its thing, it's all kind of pointless. Enter Trojan Vibrating Touch, a battery-powered finger widget that delivers...um...personalized pleasure and is pretty much guaranteed to last as long as it takes...unlike the aforementioned male-powered method of stimulation.

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Guy Asks Girls to be Careful With His Nuts

Guy wants Drumstick. Girl wants Rolo Chocolate Cone. Other girl wants Arrow Chocolate Cone. Guy still wants Drumstick. Guy becomes drumstick. Girls eat him. Guy says, "easy on the nuts." What's not to love?

Lotus Toilet Paper Absorbs More than Its Fair Share of Moisture

Check out The Giant by agency Les Ouvriers du Paradis, possibly the most charming bathroom fairy tale ever. You don't have to speak French to infer why Lotus' Just 1 is the toilet paper of choice for mythically large men.

It's so absorbent, you'll only need one sheet! That's the kind of claim that titillates T.P. abusers like me. (I like to yank generously. It's a habit I'm trying to break.)

I want to argue the spot's more logical in the manner of its pitch than Charmin's squeeze-fetish Whipple spots, but that argument fell to pieces when the giant made with the elongated Lotus-fondling.

Even Pissing and Sex Are Considered Sports by Hyundai

To cement its position as a dedicated supporter and sponsor of all sports - not just Olympics and football championships - Hyundai, with help from Duval Guillaume Brussels has launched a new campaign illustrating its support for even the most obscure sports such as dung beetle ball rolling, office waste basketball, pissing and, my favorite, bedroom Olympics.

Check out all the ads here.