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MoveOn Calls Bush Legacy a Calling Card for WWIII Since its debatable* big win over Facebook's Beacon, we've developed an almost unhealthy interests in other ad campaigns it's trying to drum up money for. Here's the latest one. (If it's too big for your browser, just click on the image and scroll down with your arrows.) We like how it says "dramatization" in the corner. As if! The Harry Situation Gets Hairy On Shake Well Before Use, Social Media Insights Consultant Ariel Waldman has written a detailed analysis and review of a campaign hair care company Garnier has launched which involves blog briber PayPerPost (now hiding behind the walls of social media company IZEA) and what is purported to be a new TV show called The Harry Situation. On the show's website, clips highlight the sexual innuendo and double entendre-laden theme of the show. It also covers what's being sold as dispute between the show's creators and Garnier who pulled their sponsorship because of the show's racy content. Of course, the controversy isn't real. Either is the show. It's all part of an elaborate ad campaign complete with what appear to be paid blog posts and a YouTube video featuring Garnier SVP of Sales Steve Lutz who explains why the company pulled their sponsorship. Because Nothing Says 'Power Trading PRO' Like a Manly Manly Man Learn the secrets to making seven million dollars in two years -- all for just $6.95 S&H! "How's this for a super trade?" the site gushes. And while you're power trading, how about some PowerThirst? We're sure the Power Trading guy will appreciate the only energy drink augmented with TURBO PUNS. Election Encumbents Play Paintball for Presidency Why strain the dancing girls for votes when the 2008 presidential candidates can play paintball instead? On Miniclip, they can. And thank heavens. Nothing says POTUS like a paintball ass-kicker. (We'd say Hillary's got the competitive advantage there. We bet she's loaded with quiet rage!) iStudio Do-Not-Want Ads Provide Chance to Unload Tasteless Holiday Offerings There's a streak of sadism in this year's holiday efforts (observe 1 and 2). We blame it on the hell CGM has wreaked on our psyches. To illustrate this devolution in goodwill, last year iStudio was all about helping people on their holiday consumer journeys. This year, loud and clear, they DO NOT WANT to deal with you. Or your crappy gifts! The "greeting" lets voyeurs sift through a bunch of weird shit the agency's been sent. If you like something (we kind of dug the zodiac thong), highlight it in red and send the agency a note about why you deserve it. Flippin' awesome. Microsoft's 'Hey Genius!' Tries Luring New Minds, Fresh Faces into Same Ol' Same LOL. To help big, stodgy Microsoft reinvent itself for the creative kiddies, Wexley presents Hey Genius. Hey Genius includes a jobcuzzi (for steamy interview de-stressing), a genius transporter, and brain massage stations for geniuses suffering from finals week. If only these attempts to make Microsoft cool actually coincided with one another. (See Zune and Vista efforts.) And if only Apple didn't already have a Genius training program. And how much do you want to bet that even if Microsoft did draw young, sexy (bedraggled?) talent away from Google or Facebook, those same kids would still feel a little jipped upon walking into Corporate? Uh, it ain't exactly Californication in the Pacific Northwest. Staffblaster Makes Hard-Partying Cogs Look Lively Upon Entry In lieu of a season's greeting, AIS, London gives us a holiday tool we'd actually like to use. The Staffblaster attacks dronelike employees -- likely sleepy, hungover and shoddily dressed -- right as they walk through the door (typically between nine and 10 AM). Must do wonders for morale. Fur-Wearing Olsens Get 'Hairy Kate and Ashley' Lashing Back in the day there were these two cute little girls named Ashley an Kate Olsen. They stole the hearts of Americans for years with their oh-so-huggable antics on Full House. All was well in America. Then, they turned 18 and all hell broke loose. All the Olsen Twins legal clocks struck 18 making it OK for every guy to "enjoy" the twins without moral repercussions. All their movies started to suck. They became fashion-clueless potato sack wearers. And...OMG...they wore fur!!! Alcoholic Beverage Raises Hopes, then Pisses on Our Parade Here's a message we've never seen before. Dude. Is this the same drink that's been promoted as the life of 11 countries? You'd think they'd have a fairly agnostic site. WTF, Pisang Ambon? Is this some sort of joke? Your PR guy promised us cross-media, karaoke and webcam delights. WHY CAN'T WE ROCK THE PALACE?!! Update: PisangAmbon.com does what its subsite won't. Check it out for videos of a cute blonde bartender mixing drinks. It's all very exciting and green. And yes! There's karaoke. (Click on the clipcaster.tv icon.) Virtual Account Manager Takes Questions -- or Not -- in Absence of Humans Meet the good for nuffin' Virtual Account Manager for Burns Marketing. He's great at looking like a douche bag and making "What the fuck?" faces when you ask him questions. We despise him because he's essentially a subservient chicken that isn't subservient. He doesn't even try. The purpose of the VAM is to make people feel like they're being helped, even while Burns Marketing is away for the holidays. Ha ha fuckin' ha! 
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