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Pay-Per-Tweet, Obama Goes FDR, Vespa Gets Web-Lift - Transport for London spoofs Clue for cyclist awareness. - Obama does fireside chat thing via YouTube. - The churches are sorry. (But a billboard with italic print may not be enough for some.) - Will businesses have to pay per tweet? - Rallying for Starbucks. (TBH, I'm running out of faith.) - The Matrix Runs on Windows. George Parker says CP+B should listen up. - Snazzy new Vespa site. Includes big green section on Vespanomics. Um, yay...? Clearway: Your Direct Connection to The Wolf. Remember The Wolf, the cool operative summoned in Pulp Fiction to clean up the remains of a guy who had his brains blown out in a moving car? UK-based cleanup firm Clearway riffs off that unseemly scenario with the ad at left -- "No job too big, no job too awful" -- depicting bloody furniture and a distinctly man-shaped stain. Among other things. The ad was banned for obvious (read: "excessively graphic, offensive and distressing") reasons. Obtusely defensive, Clearway insists the piece is "an accurate portrayal of the work they undertook on a daily basis." Which I guess is one way of saying Guy Ritchie and Quentin Tarantino -- or their gun-and-butcher's-knife-swinging muses -- get open tab when they're in town. Motrin Mania Ignited on Twitter, Mad Moms Mobilize This is one of those thing's that causes one to scream, "Oh for fuck's sake!" Or better yet, "Jesus, fucking Christ!" Why the harsh language? Because, yet again, America has lost its sense of humor and has gotten its underwear up its crack over an innocuous Motrin ad which pokes fun at babywearing. For the uninformed, babywearing (yes, there's an actual Babywearing week) is the art of carrying your child in a sling. You've seen plenty of moms and dads with a child slung around their bodies as if the baby were yet another MacBook Pro. Elf Yourself Returns for Year 3 While logic for continuing the campaign may be suspect, I guess it speaks to its undying faith that for the third year in a row, OfficeMax is rolling out Elf Yourself (complete with bigger OfficeMax logo!). Around this time last year, Elf Yourself had spawned over 11 million self-elfers. This year there's new stuff to look forward to. Sloggi Annoints World's Best Bottoms Last week, international underwear brand Sloggi held its second annual World Most Beautiful Bottom "Show me your Sloggi" competition at Club Quartier Latin in Paris. Out of 11,200 entrants who submitted photos to Sloggi, 46 finalists from 29 countries were selected with the aid of 31 million voters and a panel of seven judges including supermodel Adriana Karembeu, ESA Astronaut (huh?) Paolo NesPoli, conceptual artist Stan Murmur, FHM Editor in Chief Lomig Guillo, Invista Global's Michelle Rice Sloggi Global Brand Manager Thomas Herreiner and 2007 Sloggi winner Kristina Dimitrova. The winners? Brazilian 20-year-old Melanie Nunes Fronckowiak had best female bottom, while French 27-year-old Saiba Bombote was named the most beautiful male bottom. Seemingly, Crispin Porter + Bogusky Can Do No Wrong Crispin Porter + Bogusky, which hasn't done anything truly groundbreaking since Subservient Chicken (actually created by Barbarian Group), continues to be the poster child for awesomeness in the eyes of brands looking for some sort of extra kick. Microsoft has handed its $41 million Zune account, previously handled by 72andSunny (among others), to the shop without review. We've made it well known we aren't lovin' Crispin's current work for Vista. Please, Crispin, help us change our opinion with what we hope will be kick ass work for Zune. OK? Please? Can you do that for us? [Ed. Seriously. Is it even worth any company to attempt to out do the iPod? Why even bother?] Pole Dancer Makes Burger King Chicken Sandwich Longer OK so here's one of the most unlikely scenarios ever to unfold in real life. Thankfully, this is advertising which has nothing to do with real life and, because of that, we get stuff like this (faux?) Burger King commercial which involves poles, cleavage, flirtatious (goofy sounding) giggling, pole dancing, seductive looks and...erect chicken sandwiches? Clearly, we've been riding in the wrong subway car! One of These Blatant Instances of Eyeball-Rape Just Doesn't Belong For Park Shore BMW, agency concerto conjured up a sneaky way to get people staring at rows and rows of BMW logos for a long, long ... long ... time. See variants 2 and 3. "One of these is not like the others," the copy reads. "Find it and we'll not only offer you an incredibly low interest rate, we'll pay your 10% down payment on any 2008 model you want. You have until October 31st. So Go!" The campaign ran briefly in Vancouver last month, after which Park Shore BMW was asked to pull the ads because they "contravene branding standards." Wait. There are standards? Guess that sets Vancouver ahead of the pack. $10 and a warm cookie to whoever can score us Van City's Hallowed Book on Logo Etiquette. For Dog Food So Tasty You Might Be, Uh, Compensated. Adrants reader Martha pointed us to this Nutrecan senior dog food ad by Gomez Chica/EURO RSCG out of Medellin, Colombia. Playing on the "senior" bit, caption reads "Adults only." Gawker put it best:
Uncute. Come on, Gomez/EURO. Sex may sell coffins and cheese, but you gotta draw the line somewhere. Last I read, the job description for "man's best friend" didn't include a deep-throat clause. Digital Designers Face Off in Intel's Digital Drag Race Ingredient brand Intel has decided to dip its toes in the lemming-filled waters of marketing nirvana, otherwise known as social media, with Digital Drag Race, a competition which pits professional digital designers against one another mixed with a consumer-generated aspect for non-professionals. Launching November 17, a collection of professional designers will spend 70 minutes on a computer powered by the brand new Intel Core i7 Extreme Edition Processor using Abobe Creative Suite 4 to create a 17 second motion graphic using supplied assets; video, music, vector images. The content of the videos are to center on the themes of power, speed and innovation. After each race, judges will select competitors with the best final product. The first two digital drag races will be unveiled on the Digital Drag Race site on November 17th, after which site visitors will be able to view and vote for their favorite designs. 
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