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Ajay Bhatt is a God. And that's all Intel has to say about that. Oh, and as an addendum: "Our rock stars aren't like your rock stars" -- which is also the name of this campaign, which we so far think is fantastic, because we're members of the Revenge of the Nerds! techieverse. Big thankee to Adrants reader David for this bad-boy. Icebreakers Turn Dude into Stoner Cartoon ArnoldNYC partnered with Stardust Studios to develop "A State of Mouth," a bizarre :15 spot in which a friendly-enough-looking guy pops an icebreaker into his mouth and turns into some psychedelic spaghetti-headed Picasso thing. The last frame is especially WTFtastic -- dude appears to be crying icicles. We do not understand. It was neat watching the animation eat his face though. That's some seriously magic clown makeup. It's Another Ozzy Osbourne Ad. We're Sorry. Samsung enlists the head of the Osbourne household yet again to debut its Jack personal assistant handset. In the spot, Ozzy makes almost-funny jokes about how the phone is more attuned to his needs than previous human assistants, which respectively had hearing problems (for obvious reasons) and kept odd hours (the daytime ones). It is surprisingly not horrible. But in the event that brands race out right now with a mad hankering to book a seat on the Ozzy train, we're at pains to remind you he's got a full docket: World of Warcraft's already aboard, plus Samsung's planning still more spots. The one-time dauphin-of-Darkness must be a helluva prince to work with.
by Angela Natividad
May-19-09
Topic: Brands, Campaigns, Celebrity, Commercials, Mobile/Wireless, Television Among Women, Fling's Fingers Make a Limp Tease After 20 years of riding its existing array of brands, Mars introduces a new candy bar: the Fling, a skinny, "shimmering" (wait, what?) 85-calorie chocolate "finger" whose packaging is hot pink and whose creative invites you to "pleasure yourself." Just not beyond a PG-13 rating. We just watched the first-ever ad, the first 15 seconds of which gave us that embarrassed schoolgirl flush: two pairs of legs in a dressing room, making motions and noises as if they're doing The Do. The camera pans over the tops of the rooms, revealing the frisky couple is not a couple at all. The man is in a separate room, grunting as he struggles with clothing that's two sizes too small; and the woman, who's finished shimmying into a tiny dress, moans with quiet glee as she collapses into a seat and pleasures herself with one of Fling's, uh, fingers. Here's Work for Robots that Star Wars Neglected to Cast. US Cellular launched a really neat program called Battery Swap. If you're on the road without a charger and your phone's dying, or your battery is just really crappy in general, visit a US Cellular store to exchange your old or uncharged battery for a new one -- at no charge. To promote the program, Publicis & Hal Riney went diving in the generic mascot bargain bin. The result of that pursuit is a poindexterish robot character who dances and slaughters multi-generational slang (*shakes head sadly*) How far some robots fall while others penetrate untold heights of stardom.
by Angela Natividad
May-19-09
Topic: Campaigns, Commercials, Mobile/Wireless, Promotions, Television Obama's Been in Office Long Enough. Time to Commoditize Him. How best to commemorate the trendiest American icon today? With another American icon: the Chia pet. "Your Chia Obama is a symbol of liberty. Opportunity. Prosperity. Hope." Talking VWs Spice Up Suburbia. Or Not. In case you're not yet sick of Volkswagens with German accents and too many opinions, here's fresh fodder for the pile: "Carefree Maintenance," by Crispin Porter + Bogusky. In addition to plugging a current VW model (fortified with free scheduled maintenance!), it features cameos from the classic Bug and the '63 VW bus, which sounds sort of stoned. Whatever's clever, dude. Oh, yeah, one more thing: Heidi Klum couldn't make the shoot this time, but there's a Zoloft-enhanced man covered in motor oil, and I guess that's almost the same thing. These Brides Ain't Doin' Much for the Institution of Marriage. If the Religious Right thinks gay marriage is destroying the culture of wedlock, they're clearly not regular Bridezilla watchers, which does to marriage what My Super Sweet Sixteen did for debutante parties: make sane people extremely reluctant to have them. The ad for Bridezilla's latest season was put together by Filter Advertising. To the soothing tune of Unforgettable, brides of all shapes and sizes throw tantrums and contort their faces into cruel shapes you couldn't even imagine exist in nature. All for the perfect realization of that most sacred of vows. See? This is why we should just stop taking the ceremony so seriously and all do themed weddings. That way, if everything goes horribly wrong, you'll at least have a light saber handy. PA State Yields Glimpse into Life of Another PA -- Peter Arthur. It's not often we're impressed by a tourism campaign, particularly for a state like Pennsylvania, which hasn't exactly wowed us with its past initiatives. For PA Tourism, Red Tettemer rearranged the PA Stories effort it launched late last year. Now, instead of courting campy tales from real Pennsylvanians, "PA Stories" promotes the misadventures of one Peter Arthur, an ordinary Pennsylvanian whose two defining characteristics are a two-man scooter and his unrequited love for a red-headed waitress, who once served him some amazing shoofly pie. If the look, feel and plotline vibe suspiciously like Garden State, we don't blame you; judging from the PR folks' eagerness to position this as an "indie love story," it was probably more than a little inspired by the slice-of-life indie film genre. Carl's Jr's Resident Burnout Shakes Milk Cows for Milkshakes Some ideas should never see the light of day. "Making Milkshakes" is one of them. To plug its new orange cream milkshakes, Carl's Jr. releases this mildly bestial ad in which a hipster dances around a cow and tries shaking the shit out of it. We hate him. And we don't feel thirsty in the slightest. Brought to our attention by BL Ochman, who seemed equally repelled by the prospect of an orange milkshake after recovering from this instance of audiovisual molestation. 
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