Candystand Brings Ping Pong to the Detriment of Idle Web Workers

Considering how often we've moodily blasted them, it's humbling to announce Candystand has put out a game so appealing we've lost half our morning. And you're about to lose the rest of your afternoon. Welcome to their Wrigley's rendition of Ping Pong.

There's also a game called Around the World that's not nearly as much fun but merits checking out because we know how badly you need something to do after lunch.

Nokia Pits Left Against Right in Push to Start

With the help of Toronto-based agency Lowe Roche, Nokia Canada throws together an awesome Atari-esque campaign called Push to Start, where your left and right hands compete arcade-style for dominance.

The idea suggests Nokia's new one-handed push-to-open feature is so fantastic your hands will be fighting over who gets to nail it again and again. There's a wanking joke in this somewhere but we like the campaign too much to make it.

Roto Rooter Pimps Crappers For the Luxe Multi-Tasker

We can't imagine anything nicer than sitting on our asses with the right electronics close by. You can only improve on that experience with soothing music and a flusher.

That's why Roto Rooter is trying to make themselves relevant to a new demographic by running a contest for a pimped-out throne of dreams. When you pause and carefully consider the popularity of Pimp My Ride and sitting on your ass, it really makes perfect sense.

Thanks Shedwa for the tip-off. We'd race out of our seats to join the contest but we'd rather just sit here, breathe heavily and sometimes flush.

Live on the Fast Lane? Win Immortality in New Book

To promote her new book Wife in the Fast Lane, Karen Quinn is running a contest for fast-lane provocations. Anybody living a zippy life can turn in a video, essay or one-liner. Winners get to be characters in her next novel, which means you'll have something to send to people next Christmas that doubles as both gift and holiday card.

Come on. How many people get immortalized in pop fiction?

Guerilla and marketing efforts for the campaign were stealthily conducted by BL Ochman of What's Next Online. She's also to blame for the Up Your Budget treasure hunt of '05 and that funny little American Greetings campaign which niched itself by highlighting quirky twists in our favourite nuclear unit.

Dove Asks Users for Ads. Does This Even Count as Marketing Anymore?

Dove hops on the consumer-generated-ad-contest hype (at this point we're trying really hard not to use the word "begging" for the 200,000th time), assisting would-be advertisers with a tutorial on Dove Cream Oil. The winning ad will air during the Academy Awards in February.

Thanks Shawn for the news. Here's hoping another ad person doesn't win this one because the way everybody's beating this "campaign strategy" to death, we're obviously trying really hard to engage consumers here. Like, really, really hard.

Soprano's, AE Launch Multimedia Ad Hunt for Suitcase of Cash

The Sopranos and A&E pair up for Suitcase of Cash, an intelligent though slightly labyrinthine campaign that aims both to court interactivity and get people more involved in their advertising (rather than having them turn in a bunch of manic self-aggrandizing homemade videos).

The game coincides with the January 10 premiere of the show and recalls McD's annual Monopoly contest, though it makes better use of multiple media. Users collect game pieces to arrange on a virtual gameboard.

The game pieces are banner, print and outdoor ads, which can be photographed and uploaded, then mailed to an address that uses military face recognition (kind of like MyHeritage?) to ID the piece in the photo. For online ads, users just need to click, which we're sure will generate higher numbers for everybody's media kits this year.

Our heads are spinning but it sounds like fun and a $100,000 grand prize ain't small pickin's. It would be awesomer still if there was an Assassin twist to it - knocking people off and taking their game pieces would be right up our alley and even better for the Soprano's tie-in.

Doritos Begs Customers for Super Bowl Ads

Yahoo and Doritos marry up for a consumer-generated-media contest in which the best Doritos video to hit their site by mid-January gets aired on a coveted Super Bowl spot. A crass man at the bottom of the screen repeatedly shouts, "Watch and vote for your favourite Doritos commercial NOW!"

We were really into Doritos for a minute because they had that Japanese nut-crushing thing going on, but then they started littering and now they resort to the all-time laziest but most prevalent campaign style of the web 2.0 world: begging.

We're embarking on a new horizon in which we were supposed to work with consumers, not beg for creative at every open opportunity. Are we just going to hand over our cushy jobs and Foozball-ridden offices like that? Just like that? Come on, guys.

Mono Says Happy New Year with Godlike Feature-Mix Game

An odd new year greeting from Mono invited us to play a game of mix-and-match with facial features, a lot like getting to play with Mr. Potato Head without having to buy him.

The site includes a gallery where you can look at all the possibilities thrown together thus far. Apparently there are over 750,000.

Trouble with the site or our computers made it so we could only screw around with the lower part of the face and not the top. This got in the way of our fun-having, and we dislike anything that gets in the way of our fun-having. Oh, well. How much could a Mr. Potato Head possibly be?

Update: The darlings at Mono fixed the bug. We are happy.

Sony's Muteki Home Theater Game Offers Invincibility

Smartly opting to name themselves Three Melons instead of Two Melons, thereby avoiding comparison to an entirely different set of melons, the company has launched a site to promote Sony's Muteki Home Theater in Argentina. We are told Muteki means "invincible" in Japanese which, apparently, motivated the agency to create an online game in which a young samari, trying to be invincible, works towards becoming a powerful warrior.

To play the game, an agency representative tells us, "The whole site is in Spanish (we are translating it) but I don't think you'll have trouble to play. Just click where it says: "HAZ CLICK AQUI PARA JUGAR" (you must accept the site conditions). Then use the mouse to move the samurai and click once to jump or to use the katana. Collect 5 yellow symbols and you'll activate the Muteki Power (double click to release it)."

We had a few minutes of fun with it but we don;t think we became invincible. Give it a try and let us know if you can.

T-3: How About Some Penguin Tipping to Kick off Your Season?

Here's what we think (er, hope?) is our last holiday card of '07. T3 The Think Tank sent us a game in which you pose as an elf and tip penguins.

Far from the benign polar friends we met in Happy Feet, the birds talk trash and also emit holiday wishes from T3 employees when you knock them over. (We located T3 founder Gay Gaddis' wish. It's for nice penguin shoes.)

Great incentive for a little digital abuse. The game is simple but strangely addictive.