Pick Up Line Gets Stick Stuck

Another in a long line of commercials making men look stupid. This time it's a guy leaning over a hot girl at a pool table offering her tips on how to hold the stick when all he really wants is for the babe to hold his stick. Well, there's the holding of stick alright, but it's not his stick and it's not where he wants the stick stuck either. Enough on sticks? Good. Go watch the spot. And others from Ad Age's TV Spots of the Week.
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Advertisers Are Turning Up Their Noses at Reality Programming

"Anything that ends up in a hot tub, you don't want to be around," said Tom DeCabia, executive vice president of PHD USA, a major ad-buying firm. "Reality is not something that a lot of advertisers are beating down the door to get into."

That seems to be the prevailing opinion as buyers head towards this year's upfront. Trouble is, the networks are still cranking out the junk. And on top of that, when buyers and viewers finally give up on trash TV, there isn't really anything good in the pipeline as a replacement.

What's a media buyer to do?
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New Diet Coke Campaign Launches

Diet Coke advertising campaigns have come and gome lately leaving consumers with a confusing brand image. Coke hopes to change that with the launch of a new FCB-created ad campaign that brings back Humphrey Bogart last seen in 1991.
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First Quarter Ad Recall Ratings Released

Ad Age and IAG have released their Q1 Top Spots study. The study measures recall levels such as brand recall and likeability. The top spots for the quarter where dominated by superbowl spots including Budweiser's "Zebra Referee", FedEx's "Castaway", and Burger King's "Steve Harvey Live". Read the summary article here and download the full study here.
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NBC and Fox Fight Each Other For Ratings

It's been neck and neck in many areas for these two networks with the 18-49 demo. NBC still holds a slim lead but Fox's reality programming has made the network a major contender this year. Even with the successes these two networks have seen, media buyers are questioning whether it can continue.
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During War, Consumers Expect Advertising to Go On

A study just completed by Frank N. Magid Associates surveyed 413 people and found 79% do not have a problem with ads run during war coverage and would not think negatively about a company that does. Seventy percent acknowledge ads are a normal part of television and expect companies to continue during war time. [via MediaPost]
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New Microsoft Spot: More Harmful Than We All Thought

Microsoft gets slammed in this spoof faulting Microsoft for it's January 25, 2003 SQL Slammer that apparently caused $1B in damages in 10 minutes.

The spoof is based on the National Youth Anit-Drug Campaign's "I Helped" spot.
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Tabacco Company Tells it Like it is

Licensed to Kill is the name of a new tobacco company founded in Virginia on March 19,2003. Whether it will ever really sell tobacco is another story. The company was founded simply to prove how easy it is to set up a corporation whose charter might not be all that welcome if the truth was actually told. Sure, it's kind of a spoof. Here's a clip from their corporate statement:

"Licensed to Kill, Inc. is a tobacco company. We knowingly kill people for profit. And we're proud of it. In fact, it is the explicit aim of our corporation. Just check our articles of incorporation.

We're not like other tobacco companies that try to obscure what their business is about. If you market cigarettes, you market death. It's that simple. In a country which effectively allows corporations to be formed without regard to their purpose, corporations are allowed to kill people to make money. Addiction to cigarettes may be lethal, but profiting from spreading death is perfectly legal.

Truthfully, as a corporation, we couldn't care less about the health hazards of smoking our products. Our bottom line is and always will be boosting profits for our stockholders. That is, after all, what corporations are about. You could say that we're 'addicted to profit.' "

Clever.
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Restaurants Fight the Don't Drink Trend

In a welcome display of un-PC behavior, a new advertisement from the American Beverage Institute encourages people to have a drink before they go home. This is in response to the overwhelming anti-drinking trend that has emerged over the past few years.

"These overly conservative messages tell responsible Americans that they're wrong in going out and having a glass of beer, a glass of wine or a cocktail at dinner, or at a sports venue, and driving home," said Paul Avery, president of the Outback Steakhouse restaurant chain and the American Beverage Institute. "We're just trying to protect ourselves."

So do your part. Drink and Drive.
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Cable News Hotties

Do we have the best looking anchor women in the world? Apparently so. Here's a round up of the cable babes from the dudes over at ApeChild. Read how they describe Laurie Dhue of Fox News:

Those lips... Laurie Dhue has incredible lips. And she knows it. She probably has an entire case of lipstick in her dressing room, every single piece in bright, "fuck-me-red." She hosts a health-related program on the weekends that old people watch and send in questions about new geriatric drugs. I can't even fathom a guess at the number of heart attacks she's caused by crossing and uncrossing her legs "Basic Instinct" style while that old doctor guy drones on about arthritis and prostates. I think about 30% of Viagra sales can be attributed directly to old dudes watching Laurie Dhue, her lips, and her legs on Sunday mornings... What else can I say?

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