Candystand, We Wish We Knew How to Quit You

Remember Dr. Mario? Okay. Candystand's new Awesome Blossom is like that, except with flowers instead of pills. (Come to think of it, how did Dr. Mario ever get past the PC police?)

The blossom explosion is for LifeSavers. We could use some, considering our blood-sugar levels are low from concentrating on winning back flower petals for the last three hours. (We're overachievers.)

In Case You Ever Needed to Learn...

This has been circulating the 'net for awhile, but the information it conveys is so life-changing it merits a mention nonetheless.

Ever wonder what the difference is between marketing, public relations, advertising and branding? You probably have good textbook examples and some similar spoofs, but like anything else, the best way to learn is with an example involving sex. (Unless the topic you're learning is sex itself, in which case the best example involves Barbies or birds and bees.)

A reader points us to this series developed by Neutron, LLC.

The best thing about it is next time you're faced with any of the illustrated situations you'll know exactly what's going on. And knowing is half the battle. (That's a cheap meme.)

Manholes Mingle With Man Holes

Is it just us or does the visual in this Chinese open manhole awareness campaign connote something relating to an entirely different sort of man hole? Apparently, the Chinese like to steal manhole covers. Why we know not but it seems the plight is so severe, an ad campaign is needed to urge caution to those who find themselves near manholes of a certain size. Not that caution should be thrown to the wind when entering much smaller versions of the man hole.

Billboard Hottie Miffs Irate PTA Mom

AdFreak has encapsulated the hilarious exchange between a man who owns a spa and a woman who dislike the billboard he's using to promote the spa. It's like a Battle of the Sexes Bitch Fight and all because the board happens to shows the image of a good looking woman to illustrate what the spa can do your your body. Taking no shit and refusing to remove the board, the spa owners delivers the final blow, saying, "My next billboard is going to be of a 300-pound woman and it will say, 'Could you help me please?' Then everyone would be after me saying, 'My son is traumatized because you showed me a fat woman.'"

We like to look at beautiful people because we want to be beautiful. It's motivational. We like to look at fat and ugly people because it makes us feel better not being as fat or as ugly. What good would a board showing a average, every day person accomplish? Exactly. Absolutely nothing. And marketers don't like what nothing gets them. Extremes work. Average doesn't.

MyPetFat Kicks Off One Ton Weight Loss Tour

In a continuing effort to promote its My Pet Fat weight loss endeavors, the company is kicking off its first annual MyPetFat One Ton Tour during which the organization will make appearances across the country and award 2,000 sweepstakes winner each a one pound of the famed MyPetFat. If you're looking for an intriguingly different way to lose weight, MyPetFat is certainly something to check out.

Luxury Marketing Gets Its Six Ps of Fame

You have to pardon the Rovion-powered blather which greets you as you visit this page of Boston-based agency Winsper Inc. which promotes its latest white parer, The 6Ps of Luxury Marketing (yes, you have to fill out a form to get it but it's a really short one). While Winsper Inc. President Jeff Winsper might appear to sound like any other Rovion-powered wind bag usurping the peace and quiet of your website travels, the man is smart. And knowledge of this comes first hand having worked with the man for four years. So give the guy a break for his Rovion rambles.

Anyway, the agency has published this white paper which, like those 5Ps (or is it 4?) of marketing, examine people, product, passion, pleasure, purpose and price as they relate to marketing luxury products. It's insightful. It's informative and it does a nice job explaining the process of luxury marketing, something Winsper Inc. has been doing since it launched five years ago.

In Cannes Bid, Reverse Agency Domain Names Stolen. No One Cares

It's not often we find anything remotely resembling an original thought in this industry but we think we've found one in The Kidnapping Campaign, an effort by an unnamed interactive agency to hold other interactive agencies' reverse domain names captive until they pay a ransom. Once the ransom is paid, the agency can have its reverse domain name back and the identity of the agency behind the stunt will be revealed at Cannes only if it wins an award.

The components of the campaign include a video, filmed upside down, of a guy reading off the reverse domain names of major interactive agencies. Each reverse domain name will contain a "parasite banner." And The Kidnapping Campaign site explains the whole thing.

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WK12 Student Finds Inspiration in 'Border Film Project'

There is life after Wieden + Kennedy's 12 school. Though not necessarily in advertising. After Rudy Adler completed his stint at WK12, he set out to document life on the U.S./Mexico border and called his work The Border Film Project. He and those that worked with him provided cameras to undocumented migrants hoping to gain entry into America and to the American Minuteman trying to stop them.

Adler has launched a website that documents the project and shares the pictures taken during the project. There's also a recently released book, Border Film Project, which is being sold on Amazon, in bookstores and in American Apparel stores.

Of the project, Adler tells us, "As a writer, it definitely inspires my creative process and keeps things interesting." Indeed. Inside the walls of a creative conference room is, ironically, the last place from which inspiration usually unleashes itself.

Lee Cooper: Great Ass-Cop, or Just a Great Ass?

In case you wondered what happened to Buddy Lee, he's taking advantage of his height and conducting ass inspections.

This winning spot demonstrates for maybe the umpteenth time that most anything can be sold with a whole lot of ass and a whole lot of tacked-on moan tracks. And while we've never felt inclined to see another person's southern comfort that close, we're sure somebody got off on it, which means the ad wasn't completely for naught.

Dude what is with the tent camera?

Carl's Jr Gets Butthurt Over Butt Joke

Under the playful slogan "Where's the Angus," Jack in the Box released an ad in which Jack shows JITB employees where sirloin is located on a cow.

In the ad, one employee points out that the competition is selling Angus Burgers and asks where "the Angus area of the cow" is located. After a pause, the puzzled Jack, standing beside the, uh, rear region of the illustration, says, "I'd rather not." End spot with the usual brand roll-up.

But the cute schoolyard poke is not the funniest part. Apparently the butthurt (read: peevishly pissed-off) CKE Restaurants, whose Carls Jr. chain pushes the Angus, is taking Jack to court.

The paperwork claims the ad (and others under the same slogan) creates "The erroneous notion that all cuts of Angus beef are derived from the anus of beef cattle."

Before you point and laugh, step back and remember how upset you felt when some boy looked at you and asked if you had a pencil sharpener. And you totally fell for it. Then and only then can you fully conceive of the private angst the Angus-pushers must be suffering.

See ad at MSNBC.com.