Culture Jammers Reprise McDonald's Fat Kid for KFC

That poor McDonald's Fat Kid. We don't know where he came from but he's been our poster child for the obesity discussion over and over and over and over and, yes, over again.

Now, it seems, KFC wants in on the action. Well, not exactly. They're just victim to the latest culture jamming episode to hit the streets of East London.

Even Grown Ups Can Flirt Via Text Messaging

Have you ever noticed that parents have this strange language they use when they talk to each other while in front of their children? From spelling words out to creating entirely new words to using odd hand signals and facial expressions in order to keep their kids in the dark about the conversation, it appears an entire language has been developed just for this situation. It seems Optimus has made use of this phenomenon to promote its text messaging. Check out the spot here. Watch well because the place it's hosted, Wi-FiTV appears to let an individual view only once before requiring registration...which, of course, you could do but who wants to deal with lengthy forms?

Britain's Royal Navy Delivers Message Sloooooowly

We like gluelondon but we're not that impressed for their recent work done for Britain's Royal Navy recruitment efforts. Basically, it's a website that lets you send personalized video messages to your friends. Well, not all that personalized. From several videos of the Royal Navy doing their thing, one is chosen, the sender writes a message, chooses a name from a name list and then emails the thing to a friend or to the friends mobile.

Sadly, the site takes eons to load. It's one thing for a site to go through a slow pre-load which then results in a stellar experience but this site goes through a slew of very slow pre-loads, some of which stutteringly occur in the middle of the presentation which, itself, is far from stellar.

Targeted to 15-24 year olds, famous for their lack of attention span, we question how many will make it far enough through this site to actually click the Send button.

One of Our Own Wins 'Survivor'

We Twittered this (yes, we are one of "those" people) last night but it deserves wider recognition. We, as an industry can be proud LA-based Muse Communications Senior Account Executive Earl Cole won Survivor last night with a shut out victory. Not only did everyone on the jury vote for Cole, the man's name was never written down by anyone during any tribal council.

While we were rooting for Yau-man because he played game so ingeniously, we're happy level-headed Earl got the vote. Dreamz did his own style of manipulation but that wasn't enough to distance himself from the car winner curse. Cassandra. Well, there isn't much to say about her.

Congrats Earl.

Kraft Foists Illogical Idiocy on Agencies

If it weren't bad enough agencies have to deal with needless agency consultants making money for doing what clients are too lazy to do themselves, now they have to deal with the illogical idiocy common sense-challenged companies like Kraft are now foisting upon them. Kraft, in twisted logic not seen since CareerBuilder fired its agency because the agency's add didn't make the USA Today Top Ten, is requiring agencies participating in a review to not only cede ownership of pitched concepts (a not so uncommon practice) but also to accept liability for those concepts if they end up being used and cause legal problems in the future ( a new and extremely stupid practice).

Someone please help us here. We'll say it again. Kraft wants agencies to give up ownership of any presented idea. Then it wants to be able to sue the agency that presented those ideas if they cause legal trouble in the future...even though the agency doesn't even own the idea any more! We have a headache.

'Wise-Ass Youngsters', 'Clueless Old Farts' Need Each Other

Regarding ageism in advertising, back in March, we wrote, in part, "While it's true there isn't much gray hair in the advertising world, that's due to any number of reasons including 'older' folks leaving to start successful businesses of their own after having endured the idiocy of too many wise-ass, know-it-all 20-somethings making fools of themselves in front of their equally stupid clients and having to bail them out.

Harsh? Sure. But so is the assumption anyone over 40 is a clueless idiot. Neither line of thinking aids this (ageism) situation. People should be respected for their intelligence, not the number of candles on their birthday cake. There are just as many stupid 25 years olds out there as there are stupid 65 year olds. Age is irrelevant. Or at least it should be."

What sparked this was the fact we (OK, me) are not 30 any more as well as a post to an industry forum group by Laredo Group President Leslie Laredo which, following my suggestion the piece receive a wider audience, an edited version of her commentary ended up in Advertising Age as an opinion piece. You can (and should) read the article here.

And the Clio Winners Are...

It's Clio time. Here we go. Nike took home Advertiser of the Year. Saatchi New York was named Agency of the Year and Saatchi Worldwide was named Agency Network of the Year. Leo Burnett Italia took home the Best in Show Grand Clio in the TV/Cinema category for its work with Aqualtis Washing Machine. Leo Burnett Lisbon received a Grand Clio for its IAC Alzheimers PSA.

TBWA\Chiat\Day New York took home four Gold, three Silver and two Bronze Clios for TV work on Combos and Skittles. Abbot Mead Vickers BBDO London got aGold Clios for its "Bag of Smiles" commercial for Camelot and Fallon London received one for its Sony Bravia Paint.

DDB Chicago pulled in 12 Clios for its radio work: two Gold, five Silver and five Bronze for its work with Bud Light.

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Help Sell Rum, Channel a Fruit

By gad, can it be? Why yes, it can! It's another CGM contest, this time for Malibu Rum's new Tropical Banana. All you have to do to win the cash prize is artistically interpret Banana Boat's "Day-O," made somehow less potent in a remix by DJ RJD2.

Be quick, yellow comrades - deadline's mid-June.

Hooray for acting like an ass on camera for cash. Though to be fair, if somebody handed us a check for $25,000 for dressing up like bananas and gyrating to a bad remix, we probably wouldn't drum up any angst. And if there's liquor in the deal (there would have to be), better still.

Call Him Stinky McStinkFace. While He Stares, Nut-Kick Him.

Salty prose can only say so much. Sometimes you have to shuffle the cards a little, keep 'em guessing, pull out some mild-mannered nonsense dressed up like fighting words and observe: a bemused, uncertain audience becomes your oyster.

Because that's kind of what happened to us when we watched this Orbit ad.

Energy BBDO, Chicago put together The Affair to show even the most scuzz-tacular situation can be relegated back to sterility with Orbit gum.

We're itching to run outside and call somebody a Hoboken, just at random, while shaking a fist in righteous indignation. Throwing a shoe might be kind of awesome too, but we'll see where the feelings take us.

Nothing Encourages Pursuit of Happiness Like a French PSA

We do love a good French PSA in the morning.

Shedwa pokes us in the direction of a couple of French AIDS awareness ads admonishing watchers to "live long enough to find happiness. Protect yourself." The message is typical but the ads certainly aren't (unless you're comparing them to this. Aren't the French awesome?).

See both versions below.

o "Baby Baby" (the straight one):

o "Sugar Baby Love" (the gay one):

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