Exceptional Sheep-Counter? A Career Awaits!


There's something for everybody out there. And if it so happens that you have high levels of physical fitness, exceptional sheep counting abilities and work dogs handy, you may be looking at a future as Stockman (yes! Capital S!) with T&R Pastoral.

The "permanent afternoon shift" is advertised in this classified, fresh out of Australia. It might be that the trickiest part of the job will be conducting the rigorous daily count without finding yourself lulled to sleep.

Who says the print ad is dead?

by Angela Natividad    Aug-19-07    
Topic: Newspaper, Strange

kwp!: Outset Ad Jobs Ain't Glamorous; Why Lie?

Crap Job.jpg

A friend from Down Under sent us a couple of ads for firm kwp!, which, perhaps frustrated with the self-entitled glamazons who came a-knocking for ground-floor opportunities, decided to take a more, uh, straightforward approach.

This classified, for instance, spouts, "Help make ads. And coffee too."

To the left: "If you think this job is crap, wait 'til you see the pay." This version quickly ends, "Apply now, because chances are no-one else will."

Nice, kwp!. No one can say you didn't warn them.

Playing gofer does wonders for your ambition. Having had to fetch our fair shares of coffee and muffins, every new day only made us hungrier for the moment we could send our own interns' asses all over town for the one chocolate croissant left in a 30-mile radius at 2:30 in the afternoon.

Nothing makes a pastry taste better than the sweet smell of fear.

by Angela Natividad    Aug-13-07    
Topic: Agencies, Good, Newspaper

Google Grows, Star Blows, Diorama Explodes, Pants Lost


- While the statement "more money than God" really doesn't make any sense, Google certainly has a lot of the green stuff. Recently posting its Q2 revenues of $3.8 billion, the digital giant continues to grow with a 58 percent jump from last year and a 6 percent jump from last quarter.

- In Toronto, some are not very happy the Star has begun accepting cover wraps as ad units.

- Using the word "explosion" in an airport diorama gives good reason for the rest of the world to think those of us in advertising seriously do have a screw loose.

- 50 Cent is angered over a Shoot the Rapper banner ad on MySpace which contains the likeness of him. He's suing MySpace.

- Former Deutsch Group Creative Director David Rosen has published I Just Want My Pants Back, a novel about a 25 year-old man "searching for meaning, love, a profession - and a missing pair of pants" and who is..."in need of a functional vagina."

by Steve Hall    Jul-23-07    
Topic: Brands, Newspaper, Publishing

Verizon's Dumb Dad Yields Breast Flip Phone Ad


"Dude! I got it! since we used that Dumb Dad shit a while back and everyone got all over our asses for it, let's just go back to the hot chick. No one complains about the hot chick. I mean they're everywhere. We'll just have her flip the phone across her chest with a fuck me look on her face and this bad boy will fly off the shelves. Cool?"

Oh wait, this is a Samsung ad, not a Verizon ad. Oops, wrong conference room. Sorry about that.

by Steve Hall    Jun-18-07    
Topic: Brands, Good, Newspaper

Oral B Solves Smelly Telephone Listing Problem


There are many ways to sell mouthwash and, believe us, we've seen them all. Except for this new piece of work for Oral-B from Leo Burnett Brazil. No one likes to be near a person with bad breath so why should it be any different with telephone listings?

by Steve Hall    Jun- 5-07    
Topic: Good, Magazine, Newspaper

Newspaper Increases Circulation, Pigs Fly


"When pigs fly" would be the appropriate response to anyone discussing the notion of a newspaper increasing its circulation. Well, the Philadelphia Inquirer did increase its circ and pigs did, in fact, fly. Beginning last Thursday night, to celebrate the paper's 63,000 circulation increase and with help from Gyro Worldwide, flying pigs adorned the Philadelphia Inquirer building. Along with flying pigs, Gyro developed a print and radio campaign to celebrate the increase. Check out the video of flying pigs here. It's not something you see very often especially when it relates to newspapers.

by Steve Hall    May- 7-07    
Topic: Newspaper, Outdoor, Radio

Metro Gym Gives You A Tight Ass For Your Next Office Party


Oh, the fabled office party. That national workplace pass time which accomplishes nothing except to make you look like an idiot in the morning for that thing you did last night which, in the heat of the moment, you thought was funny...but really wasn't. There are countless stories of office parties gone wrong but Metro Gym wants to help. Well, at least with one ass-pect of of the party: toning your ass to perfection so when you place your naked ass on the copy machine, the reaction to the result will be jealously rather than laughter. Metro Gym thinks there's nothing hotter than a tight ass sitting on a copy machine and they promise to help you get that tight ass.

more »

by Steve Hall    May- 3-07    
Topic: Newspaper, Racy, Strange

Icahn Ad Puts Motorola On Blast


In a somewhat misguided attempt to demonstrate why Motorola's shareholders should hand the keys to the coffer to him, Carl Icahn took out a full-page newspaper ad in The Wall Street Journal to air a, well, bitchslap in ink.

In appropriately dramatic boldface type his harsh letter reads, "I am convinced that significant stockholder representation in the Motorola boardroom, even by a single director, is absolutely necessary at this troubled company [...] I am seeking a single seat, a single voice, asking for accountability instead of 'business as usual.'"

He also mentioned that management was like "something straight out of Alice in Wonderland," a quote we particularly like.

Motorola recently responded with some tome about how very very wrong Icahn is and how serious and responsible they are.

Oh yeah? You want to talk serious? Why do RAZRs suck so bad?

by Angela Natividad    May- 3-07    
Topic: Newspaper

Cape Times Uses Tragedy to Sell Papers


The ever-cheery Ivan at Ads of the World points us to a campaign for The Cape Times, a South African daily.

Peaceful prints depict the quiet before a given international storm. The slogan quotes the catastrophic date ("Monday 10 September 2001," for example) and soberly admonishes, "The world can change in a day. Don't miss your daily edition of in-depth news. Cape Times. Know All About It."

Check out 9/11, the Kennedy assassination, Soweto uprising and Hiroshima versions.

While leveraging tragedy always draws some heat, we're on the fence with these. They get the point across nicely but it rings callous to capture moments of quiet intimacy that took place before the world came tumbling down.

Maybe that means the campaign is good. Either way, Lowe Bull is to blame.

Suggested slogan change: "When yo' shit hits the fan, we'll be printing the casualty list!"

by Angela Natividad    Apr-27-07    
Topic: Newspaper, Strange

Guitar Hero Returns, Land Rover Moves, Tribune Privatizes


- The Seventh Chamber, Kontraband's Viral seeding agency, is launching a new Xbox viral to mark the release of Guitar Hero 2.

- Manhattan based Submedia is unveiling a new technology for use with industry-standard 6 by 4 light boxes with a new campaign for Land Rover's LR2. A total of 15 displays, which contain no moving parts and become four-second movies as viewers walk past, will be rolled out in New York, Chicago, Los Angeles, San Francisco and Miami this week.

- Cynopsis reports, "Tribune Company, with its strategic review process concluded, announced a transaction which will take the company private, with shareholders receiving $34 per share in a two-stage plan."

- Omnicom's Chuck McBride-created Cutwater just snagged the $360 million Jeep creative account.

- Writing ever so eloquently, "You'll very probably get laid off, what with the fucking deluge of account losses and reviews this sad excuse for an agency is currently looking at," the always opinionated George Park sounds off Draft/FCB's claim everything is just fine.

- Here's an inventive use of an elevator to promote a forklift.

by Steve Hall    Apr- 3-07    
Topic: Newspaper, Outdoor, Video