Rumors of Polar Bears' Deadliness Are Grossly Exaggerated

The polar bear was recently added to the Department of the Interiors' list of endangered species. In response to this tragedy, National Grid tapped Mullen, who apparently plans to save them by encouraging children to adopt them as pets.

I'm sure Grizzly Man would weep with (either indignation or) longing. Bear envy? Get your own.

Firstborn assisted with the digital components of the campaign.

Th1ng Saves London, Flash Searched, Millennials Charge, FailWhale Merched

- Th1ng was chosen to whore "London's outstanding cultural and business successes" and "its film industry and talent" for the London 2012 Olympic Games. Sounds like hard times in the Mother Country.

- With the launch of Facecard, edo teaches Millennials how to confuse money with plastic. I wish I'd had a self-interested big brother who cared enough to teach me how to charge. Oh wait, I did: Wells Fargo.

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Hard Abs Go Soft, Bowflex Powers On

Earlier today I happened across this testosterone-tacular Bowflex Revolution pop-up.

I can't believe Bowflex is still around! There are so few women that would actually go for Mr. Oily Abs -- but the sight of a perennial Bowflex man turns any guy I'm with into a socially inept troglodyte.

My dad, once a self-proclaimed man of steel, used to watch Bowflex infomercials late at night and go, "When I'm old and retired, you will bring me that machine as a gift."

And because I was five and had no idea how dangerous a delusion could be, I would assent. He's still waiting for one.

The Denver Egotist Has Sure Got a Big Staff.

"I am the Denver Egotist and I will be back on Monday ... maybe Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. It depends on when I wanna kick yer ass."

In an email titled "We're coming out," the Denver Egotist sent us the above video, which reveals its identity, or at least the way it wants to be seen. Definitely less disappointing than that one time KISS removed its makeup.

AgencySpy, another site that does does the "we are everyone and everywhere and nowhere -- bwahahaa!" thing, dug it.

Coldwell and Banker Revisit Home Affordability

After reviewing the campaign launch earlier this year, we haven't heard much from the chatty portraits of Coldwell and Banker.

But it looks like the dead founders have been busy. 10 videos aired since February?!

See Deja Vu, which launched a little over a week ago. It playfully ties the real estate slump to Coldwell Banker's century-long past. Kind of a Cartoon Network feel.

That spot is reinforced by Prediction, which I don't quite get, but which is also kinda Cartoon Networky. Anyway, nice stick-to-itiveness by McKinney/Durham on what I originally thought was a one-hit wonder.

Jet Blue Sports Leather to Regain Respect

Royale leaps to the aid of JWT, whose "Happy Jetting" campaign for Jet Blue has been poorly received -- and not - just - by - us.

"Jetting" is set to ELO's Mr. Blue Sky and has a poppy feel-good Target vibe -- except, you know, more blue. It's also jam-packed with effortful Jet Blue-isms like "Jetting is decked out in leather," "Jetting means business," "Jetting isn't flying," and "Jetting thinks you deserve a snack."

Aww, Jet Blue gave us a coooookie.

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Recycle Right: Start with All Those Hoarded Dreams

In this charming new spot for its "Save Today, Save Tomorrow" campaign (an unwieldy URL if you ask me), EDF Energy enlisted Miklha Singh, Anne Packer and Sammy Lee to reflect on their Olympic glories, using "recycled" footage of them in their prime.

The ad concludes with a shot of the adorable Lee and the tagline, "This commercial was made from recycled dreams." Better recycled than left broken, I guess.

The spot was created by FEEL Films for Euro RSCG/London. It marks Phase II of EDF's "It's not easy being green" campaign -- another effort that appears to have been shaped in the blistering flames of nostalgia.

I liked it a great deal, even with the epilepsy-inducing London 2012 Olympics logo at the end.

Shredded Wheat (with Strawberries!): the Official Cereal of Wayward Women

What satisfies a hungry woman? Not the muscle-bound napper at left. Shredded Wheat with Strawberries, on the other hand, might give sex-starved Wifey a run for the money.

The ad comes straight out of next month's Real Simple and is brought to you by Post, the come-hither cereal company with plenty of other other colon-friendly choices. Tempting. But will they make us breakfast in bed?

Technology Advances, Draft Dorks Out, Yellow Pages Take Shot in the Dark

- On her grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary, a Millennial reflects on how the advancement of technology in the last century have made life different.

- To distract from its increasing irrelevance, the Yellow Pages is engaging in a few guerrilla stunts. Nothing we haven't seen before.

- Draft FCB is a new breed agency with great analytics. It's gonna transform this industry in a modern way -- and that means holistic offerings with a strong Return On Ideas, not to mention rad rock music and awesome whitewash camera tricks. And then we choked on our rapidly-escaping brain cells and died. From George "Fuck Louie, that's some 'Analytics' you've got there!" Parker, via MTLB.

- Some mothers want John McCain to keep their babies out of war. Others are begging him to take theirs. (Via.)

'Slap Me in the Face and Call Me HAD!'

It's been confirmed: vibrating banners can kill. Because no man is safe where the banner ads dwell -- not even if he's the type of man who confuses J-Lo's lips with Angelina's.