Hardee's Unveils Un-Sexiest Commercial of All Time

Wait, what? A Carl's Jr. and Hardee's ad without DDD cup cleavage? No ass cheeks in short shorts? No cavorting with a King Kong-sized burger while wearing a string bikini? No oral sex with a burger while riding a mechanical bull? No 40-plus hot supermodels seducing young men Mrs. Robinson-style? No hot Turkish models wearing a bikini emblazoned with miniature images of a charbroiled turkey-burger? No female teachers dancing seductively in front of a classroom?

72and Sunny! This is unacceptable? We won't stand for this! Have you really succumbed to public outcry...and given us a hot guy to drool over instead of a hot girl? If so, you are doing it wrong! This professional bull rider guy you have in the ad, Douglas Duncan? Wearing WAY too much clothing!

Seriously? Really? You can give us miles of Kate Upton's cleavage, Nina Agdal who can't seem to keep a bikini top on and Sara Jean Underwood and Emily Ratajkowsi who can't seem to keep their ass cheeks covered but you can give us...a fully clothed Texas dude eating your Texas Toast breakfast sandwich?

Fail.