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Pawk the Fawking Caw You Retawd! Watch. Just watch. You don't even have to know anything about Mad Men to love this Funny or Die clip in which a bunch of Massholes run an ad agency pitch. Don't miss New Kid Joey McIntyre as Roger Sterling. There's no nudity in the clip but unless your office is cool with language akin to that spoken in a bar after the Red Sox lose, you might want to listen to this one with earphones on. Sadly, Creative Director Won't Eat Shorts. Happily, Agency Wins Account Back in March of this year, Captains of Industry Creative Director told the industry in a video he'd cook and eat his shorts if his agency didn't win a solar energy account by the end 2009. Happily, Ted doesn't have to eat his shorts as his agency recently won the Alteris Renewables account. In yet another video, we see Ted prepping his shorts for consumption by adding all manner of marinade and spice to the shirts and then tossing them on the grill. But, as he meticulously sets the table for the dreaded feast, ted gets a call from the agency informing him Alteris has signed on as a client. Effies Call, Bourbon Quizes, Hocky Moms Fight- Entry materials for the 2010 Effie Awards are now available on www.effie.org. The On-Time Effie entry deadline is October 14, with the last chance to enter set for November 4. - On September 23 at the Yale Club of New York, MediaPost will host its Creative Media Awards. - 72andSunny is out with an online and offline campaign for the newest 2K Sports video game, NHL 2K10 featuring three hockey moms who take out their aggressions, and take on NHL pros, with their favorite party game, NHL 2K10. Cheers Alum John Ratzenberger Wishes Patriots Happy 50th To celebrate the 50th anniversary of the New England Patriots, Cheers alum John Ratzenberger makes an appearance in this promo which aired last night while the Patriots played at Gillette Stadium. There's nothing really all that special about the video but if you love the Patriots, you'll probably find it interesting. Yes. Shoes Can Give Your Feet An Orgasm. Why should your feet be left out of the fun? Buy them some Bianco Footwear and give them an organs. Yes. Seriously. According to this commercial, Bianco Footwear will, indeed, give your feet an orgasm. My Life Sucks! Mask Me You Nasty Nurse! We have absolutely no idea what this commercial is for but...oh wait...it's for medical company Draeger AG but still. So they make medical and safety equipment but the concept of this ad escapes our simple mind. Yea, we get that a guy's having a wonderful fantasy while under some kind of drug and he wants more of the drug when a nasty nurse attempts to remove the mask from his face as he lies in a hospital bed but what exactly are they trying to sell here? Dragaer delivers great drugs? Great drugs create great hallucinations? Nurses are nasty? Men in puffy organ-shaped costumes always get the hot girls? Inhaling gives you a LIfestyles of the Rich and Famous sort of life? We are at a loss. Please help us. What Is It About Slow Motion And Breasts? We've all had that experience while at the pool, at the beach or at some random event when a stunning looking woman appears and enraptures everyone with her voluptuous pulchritude. As she struts her way into the crowd, it's as if everything shifts to slow motion and every move her body makes is amplified tenfold. Every step. Every arm movement. Every turn of the head. And, yes, every gentle gyration of her breasts as if they were swelling waves in a sea of flesh. If for some incomprehensible reason you can not picture for yourself the above scenario, there's always a commercial which will do it for you. In this case, it's an ad for rethink's Save the Boobs breast cancer effort, boobyball. Wallow in the slo-mo-liciousness of it all Real Life Interferes With Latest Viral Debacle This is what you get for deciding to enjoy the weekend as opposed to spending it obsessed with Twitter. While we were right on top of the Motrin Moms Fiasco a few months back, we completely missed this past weekend's Denmark Karen Debacle which involved a video of a woman seeking the father of her newborn baby. Turns out the whole thing was for Visit Denmark. In the video, which was created by Grey Denmark, "Karen" holds her baby and speaks into the camera. She talks about how she met the father of her baby a year and a half ago in a bar and how they proceeded to have sex at a place call the Custom House bar. She doesn't remember where he's from or what his name is but she does manage to mention a few tidbits about Denmark in the video. Rishad Tobaccowala Talks Brand-Building, Damage Control and the Art of Seduction At ad:tech Chicago last week, and prior to his opening talk, I approached Denuo CEO Rishad Tobaccowala in hopes of scoring an interview later on. He was in a hurry and answered in a way I found brusque and upsetting -- which ended up colouring my feelings about the keynote. Tobaccowala emailed to apologize immediately after reading the article I wrote, and was also good enough to give me almost three hours of his time in an interview -- more of a conversation, really -- later that week. We never did get around to a formal Q/A. But I learned so much about branding and relationships from him that most of the gems would be lost if I didn't whip out the cam and start recording. See the footage below the drop. Diaper Full of Shit Helps Reduce Teen Pregnancy There are thousands of ways to dissuade teens from ending up pregnant. A diaper full of shit isn't one we've seen before. But we like it because that's what a newborn will, without fail, bring to a new mother. Hour after hour. Day after Day. Week after week. Month after month. You get the picture. It's a steady flow of...OK...let's not go there. Let's just say it's a commitment. A lifetime commitment. Once a person makes the decision to have a baby, it's forever. That baby, no matter how old it gets, will always be a baby to his or hers parents. And if the parent isn't up to the job and isn't there for the child, that poor baby's life is going to be an endless uphill battle. So if you're going to have a baby, you had better be ready to deal with a lot of shit because that's what coming your way. 
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