OJ Coquettish About Details in Non-Confession Confession

simpson_glovie.jpg

We're amazed by how the Patriot Act has affected every one of our rights except protection from double jeopardy, which remains Simpson's ongoing joke on a rubbernecking nation.

It was only a matter of time before the definitive chapter of his botched If I Did It... book leaked to the press. Our favourite part of what he would have done (if he did it) was the end: "Then something went horribly wrong, and I know what happened, but I can't tell you exactly how."

Laughter. And the smacking of gloved hands.

Read the rest of the chapter summary here.

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Celebrity, Online, Publishing, Social, Worst



Bush Screws Country in Raunchy Guerilla Effort

bush_roleplay.jpg

Turning a serious topic into a matter of farce is a great way to keep things relevant. Better still is the marriage of farce and sex, especially when it comes to politics.

It's not really clear who's behind this viral about a couple that decides to roleplay as Bush and The Country, but it's funny in a sadistic way to watch the one have a go at the other with pillow-talk like, "I'm gonna get you involved in a unjustified war in Iraq - with no exit strategy!" as the notched shouts, "Don't pull out, don't pull out!"

It's not hard to tell who here is getting screwed. Better still, the roleplay Bush tosses in some saucy grammar like "I'm gonna jeopardate social security - and I'm gonna make millions without healthcares."

We'll see how big of a splash the statement makes with 'net users at large, but you have to commend a group that attempts to turn you on, alter political bearings and make you laugh all at the same time. The words "habeas corpus" were never sexier.

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Online, Racy, Viral



PubesAid Gets Outed, Hair Keeps Helping the Hungry

pubesaid2.jpg

The culprits behind that Pubes Aid campaign (where celebs sell pubies for the young and hungry) have outed themselves in a series of self-aggrandizing press releases. Thank Action Aid for catering to the odd sense of philanthropic perviness you didn't even know you had.

Body hair is a hot topic among charitable souls with marketing savvy, from Truth's back hair effort to Telecom Arnet's offer to help the hairplug-hungry in exchange for fresh broadband meat.

We're not really sure how to feel about the trend except to say, and this might be too much information, that in the shower this morning we stared at the collected hairball beside the drain for a long while, ruminating on the merits of trying to shape it into an Adrants martini and selling it on Ebay for Darfur dollars. It's worth a shot, yeah?

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Online, Strange



Ass-Plucked Agencies Peck Around Diversity Hiring Puzzle

minority_hiring.jpg

With nowhere left to run, agencies like Ogilvy are biting the bit and listing goals for minority hiring in '07, which include such ambitions as 16% minority new hires at exec level and 33% at the general level. Interpublic's created a minority incubator to nurture them through those first few payless, sleepless years in agency life. And others, like Arnold Worldwide multicultural programs director Tiffany Warren, are simply prostrating themselves in desperation: "I beg, I plead with [young minorities]: I tell them they'll make a real difference," she says.

Despite best intentions by agencies, however, nobody is out of the clear yet. A major critique of Ogilvy's percentage goals is that agencies can't gauge at the outset who or how many they'll hire, fire and promote in a given year. Additionally, the definition for "minority" is left up to the agencies themselves, meaning for the few who blanket "nonwhites" under the term, women remain an unprotected scarcity. You also get a symptomatic reverse-racism effect that can be awkward for the minority, agency and other employees involved: "You've got to have senior, visible minorities who can act as validation" that the industry has opportunities, says Ogilvy co-CEO Bill Gray.

Awwwwkwaaaaard.

Is there any way merit gets to play into this? Nobody wants to walk around knowing they get the Gucci suit because big O had a minority deficit.

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Agencies, Policy



Enjoy what you've read? Subscribe to Adrants Daily and receive the daily contents of this site each day along with free whitepapers.

Hairvertising Helps Lower Mortgage Rates, Too

lowermybills_com.jpg

Speaking of hairvertising, in our blog travels we discovered this weird ad for Lower My Bills in which the words "Calculate new payment" is razed into the back of a guy's head. We don't know what one has to do with the other but clearly body hair does something to people and can even compell them to refi, not just feed the hungry. Who knew? And to what other noble ends will body hairplay take us?

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Online, Strange



CMO's Shy Away from $2 Million Super Bowl Spots

superbowl07_logo.jpg

It may have been a smarter move than we thought for the pigskin free-for-all to lean on audience marketing muscle because apparently only 13 advertisers will admit to having purchased a seat in the ad line-up this year. Those most vocal in pre-game marketing include Anheuser-Busch, the NFL and Dorito's.

Advertising Age notes usual suspects like Snickers, CareerBuilder and Taco Bell are keeping mum, and not one ravenous big pharma name, movie studio or telecom brand has admitted to getting on board.

Increased pressure on CMO's, nervousness over one-click critics, and higher figures (upwards of $2-2.6 mill) for ad units are allegedly to blame, but we're looking on the bright side: possibly more attention paid to the actual game and more exciting marketing campaigns executed through a calendar year, as they should be, instead of advertisers traditionally slacking 11 months then blowing their load on game day. Because come on. Did it ever make sense to have people talk about your wicked ad campaign for a day versus all fucking year?

Geico, with their well-timed execution and clever ads, are great at generating attention season after season. And in case you were wondering, word on the street is the gecko's not batting an eye in the direction of the Super Bowl.

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Super Bowl 2007, Television, Trends and Culture



Coke, Nestle Say Be Gullible, Drink Fat-Eating Fizz

enviga.jpg

Purveyors at Coke and Nestle are greeted this new year by a lawsuit from the Center for Science in the Public Interest because of Enviga, a pilot beverage that playfully assures you'll burn a whopping 60-100 calories after just three cans.

We'll be slightly nicer than Copyranter and say sure, that's more than possible. Walking to your car, getting in, buying a six-pack of bullshit and raising and lowering your arm as many times as it takes to down half of that could possibly burn 60-100 calories. Not to mention the brain cells you burn during ingestion, which are notoriously heavy.

To be fair it's not like Enviga was the first to encourage the all-too-willing to eat and drink more for weight loss. We totally fell for the pasta-chocolate diet.

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Bad, Poster



AllState Gets Good Hands Dirty with Car Thefts and Swan Dives

allstate_goodhands.jpg

AllState, best known for its mild-mannered commercials and provocative slogan, "Are you in good hands?" conducts an out-of-character but well-orchestrated PR stunt with the help of Leo Burnett.

In the subsequent ad a man on a mission steals a vehicle and drives it surreally off the top of a Marina City parking garage in Chicago. And just when you're like "OMGWTFBBQ," that soothing meme of a tone takes over: "AllState. Are you in good hands?"

Nervous laughter all around.

This print ad, where a Grand Am teeters precariously over the edge of that same parking structure, follows up on the idea.

AllState, typically favouring the soberest of marketing stances, surprised us with this one. It's a little like God making a joke at our expense. We're sure they got some good buzz out of the deal and maybe even an account or two since people accidentally drive off narrow parking structures all the time.

by Angela Natividad    Jan-15-07    
Topic: Brands, Commercials, Good, Magazine, Online, Outdoor, Poster, Television