GSTV Offers Growth You Can Count On

Like a prostitute guaranteeing great service, a new campaign from away-from-home television network GSTV promises offer a five-time makegood versus the typical industry standard one-time makegood for any impressions not delivered. Hmm. Making good five times instead of one. We like.

Continuing down this innuendo-laden road, hyping this "for a good time, call" approach are three print ads, one of which caries the headline, "Growth you can count on." My aren't we milking this for all it's worth. Ooops. Milking. We just dropped innuendo ourselves. Sorry about that.

Leaving that particular innuendo behind, another ad features Miss Michigan USA 2011, Channing Pierce, as a "media mixologist" who creates perfect media mixes. And yet another hypes GSTV's delivery promise comparing at-home TV delivery to a pregnant woman delivering a pineapple to a confused doctor. The tagline reads: "Surprise Delivery? Trust GSTV for a guaranteed, smooth delivery. No recovery needed."

We will give this campaign points for its oddity quotient. A lot of points.