Woman Has Sex With Vodka Bottle

A new print and outdoor ad campaign for Skyy Vodka depicts a woman clad in red leather tights and high heels getting...um...poked by a vodka bottled. Marin Institute watchdog Bruce Lee Livingston said, "This is just ridiculous, it's porn-a-hol. Underage kids will look at this and associate sexual prowess with drinking Skyy."

Well, duh. Alcohol does increase sexual prowess but we guess that's besides the point. Livingston thinks the ad industry can't regulate itself and said, "The FTC should be all over this."

Branding expert Steven Addis thinks the ad is crass and told USAToday, "It's just jamming a bottle in a woman's crotch,. A great ad uses heart or mind. This one's starting below the waist."

Defending the ad, Skyy Marketing Director Maura McGinn (now that's funny) said, "It's about the content of our product. We're an adult product consumed mostly in the evening and in flirtatious situations."

Our opinion? Well, at least she isn't being blown to bits Michael Bay-style or tortured Saw-style. Oh wait. That would be perfectly fine because, well, blowing shit up is absolutely fine in America but alluding to sex, even in the slightest, is just wrong. And harmful. And bad. And will ruin the purity of every last American. Because sex is evil. Sex is the Devil!

Skyy Vodka should be hung for this travesty, by God!