Emerald Nuts: The Snack of Choice for Discriminating French ... Nuts.

"French squirrel goes nuts" -- one more reason to avoid bringing housewarming gifts to your vinyl-spinning French neighbour,* squirrel or not.

"Thank you, Larry, for picking these sad little acorns out of the dirt and putting them in this box. I feel so warm and tingly inside; now we will be friends forever."

Cold, man, cold.

Disseminated for Emerald Nuts, the brand of choice for nut elitists (and kryptonite to the mischievous Robert Goulet!), by Feed Company.

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*Exceptions to this rule include AIR and Justice -- but if you're lucky enough to find yourself living next door to them, we suggest bringing gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh, rather than nuts, roasted or not.