If They're Gonna Be Plotting Your Demise, Better to Eat Them While Sober

Belin Crazy Rings/Tubes/Starfish are essentially drinking snacks. We'd call them beer nuts but the branding material reads "l'apero cingle" -- aperitif snacks. Classy.

Anyway, to best target its market of casual at-home cocktailers, the French company is broadcasting this ad from its website and in banners on sites like MySpace. Our best guess is that they thought, "Drunk people engage in slightly malevolent, poorly thought-out hijinks all the time, so what if our snacks did too?!", and went zealously from there.

Translation (this is tough for us, so HELP A BLOGGA OUT if you can do better):

The snack facing the camera goes, "Hey! Le fou se marchera jamais," which means something like "This idiot will never be gone," at which point you see said idiot get launched into the air on the strength of a just-opened beer can. On his way down, it's obvious he's gonna miss the bowl, so he goes, "Ca ne marche paaaas!" -- or, roughly, "This isn't gonna go so well!" And then he falls facedown on the table and is crushed by his can.

Then the mean one goes, "Bien casse, mec!" -- "Nicely broken, guy!"

(*shakes head*) Mean little buggers.