Rumors of Polar Bears' Deadliness Are Grossly Exaggerated

The polar bear was recently added to the Department of the Interiors' list of endangered species. In response to this tragedy, National Grid tapped Mullen, who apparently plans to save them by encouraging children to adopt them as pets.

I'm sure Grizzly Man would weep with (either indignation or) longing. Bear envy? Get your own.

Firstborn assisted with the digital components of the campaign.