Starbucks Launches Mermaid Escort Service

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Well. We weren’t sure at first and we were kind of stunned to see it. But what other conclusion could we draw after seeing the new Starbucks logo? It seems the brand has shifted gears and is now offering up mermaids instead of coffee. And is that really a bad thing? After all, mermaids are hot! Just like coffee. So it all makes sense from a brand perspective don’t you think?

Perhaps we’ll be able to order mermaids by size. Tall mermaids and grande mermaids which, we guess, would be considered BBW. But we’re not quite sure what a venti mermaid would look like. We’ll have to visit a local Starbucks and report back our findings.

For years brands have been in search of profitable line extensions. We just never imagined Starbucks would stray so far from the culinary consumables it’s known for. Well, what do we know about marketing? We just report it as we see it.

So stop by your nearest Starbucks tomorrow. It’s sure to be an amazing new adventure with the brand.

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Steve Hall

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