Early today Advertising Age ripped into Starbucks for its Pike Place coupons and throwback cups (in stores for six weeks, a barista told us). All part of an ongoing attempt to rekindle stale sparks with a costly ($100 million) promotional campaign, which is looking more Grocery Chain — and less Indie Cafe — by the minute.
Once upon a time, I loved Starbucks more than my hypothetical Firstborn-to-Be. It’ll take a lot more than a buttery homebrew and gaudy vouchers to rein in the trouble of a brand that’s just become too commercial.
‘bucks, why don’t you straighten out your gossipy baristas. And while you’re at it, cart out all that promotional crap. If I want to read The bloody Kite Runner, I’ll visit your Barnes & Noble chain, thankyouverymuch.
Maybe learn a little latte art. Because face it: your salesmonkeys can blend all right, but would they hold their own in a barista competition?
No. And if you made them focus more on their art, maybe they’d stop visiting each other and gossiping about customers they hate and who’s eating who. Because I’m sick of that crap. You used to be a friendly place. You used to be my favourite place.
Now? Now I’d rather go to a dive where I’ll at least get a smile, free wireless and maybe a baklava. You’ve lost me — and I kind of hate you for it.
