Sex Tape Yields Yet Another Non-Celeb

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Apparently a sex tape phase is something you go through when you become Paris Hilton’s latest elbow buddy. And while we thought Paris was genuinely pissed when her sex tape found its way into public hands, we have trouble believing the same about Kim Kardashian, whose non-career can only improve by proof of coitus with co-star Ray J, who himself is really only famous by association to sister Brandy.

A spokesperson for Kim says she’s been caught “completely off-guard” by the forced release, and he vigilantly promises she’ll take legal action. After seeing the stylized images and the way she plays up the camera on the badly-named Kim K Superstar, it’s easy to imagine she probably prepped for the role in front of her bedroom mirror months in advance. Half-conscious gropes in the dark these ain’t.

The website off-handedly mentions her relationship to Paris a few times and even cites Paris’ own rise to sex tape glory a couple of years ago, so if Kim’s trying to profit from a similar forced outing, she’s doing a bad job of hiding it.

Well, here’s our paltry contribution to the Kardashian media frenzy in the make. Or not.

It’s possible that this media model, which is growing in popularity, is scalable beyond F-list celebrities. Really, is pretending to be appalled about the sale of your sex tape all that different from creating a flog? Maybe this is the next logical direction post consumer-generated-media-frenzy. Maybe Julie Roehm, who only has semi-exciting insinuations of scandal under her belt, has paved the way for a sexier, more personal ad exec. Maybe we should all release sex tapes and watch consumer attention skyrocket. It’s got to be more effective than just asking them to send us videos.

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Steve Hall

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