Huge Oversized Breasts to Bombard Television

I Want Them Even Bigger!

Already there are douche ads, Tampon ads, bra ads, erectile dysfunction ads all over television. Why should big, round, juicy, gellatinous, pendulous mounds of ….uh…oh…sorry…breast implants be excluded? If there was ever such a thing as family TV, it is now certainly gone. ABC has decided to accept ads from breast implant maker Mentor who will air six differnt commercials promoting its saline implants. They will air on the network’s “Extreme Makeover” reality series.

“We strive to create a classy, elegant ad that directs patients to where they can get general information. It’s not intended to be a sexy ad,” said Mentor Director of Global Marketing Sara DeRousse. OK, sure. Breasts are not sexy. Try to convince anyone of that. But I guess that’s not the point. Now, when teenage girls ask their parents for bigger boobs for graduation, their parents will at least know where to get them.

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