Fifth (Or Later) Assvertising Campaign Dubbed ‘World’s First’

Steve Hall

Mar. 21, 2007
1 min read

We just love when big companies usurp the ideas of others and claim to be the first at something when, in fact, very clearly, they are not. Why? Because we get to trash them for it. Had anyone behind the Gene Simmons Family Jewels show done even the tiniest bit of home work, they’d realize they were not, in fact, the first to launch an assvertising campaign. Far from it. They’re not even the second. Or the third. Or the fourth. Do your homework, people. Damn, a simple Google search turns up 17,500 results!

While slapping panties that read “Gene Simmons Family Jewels”on 25 models and having them prance about tomorrow at the Hard Rock Cafe’s Times Square location to promote the second season of Simmons’ show, those involved seem to have forgotten this very thing has already occurred in the same city. NightAgency, which created the concept, did it for New York Health and Racquet Club. Kodak did it at a trade show in Boston. A Russian tire shop did it. MTN did it in Italy. And those are just the ones we’ve covered.

If you really must see this ill-name “first,” hurry over to the Hard Rock Cafe in Times Square tomorrow, Thursday, March 22 at 12PM.

UPDATE: Our explanation seems to have caught someone’s attention. The words “world’s first” have been removed from the press release.

Steve Hall

TRENDING AROUND THE WEB

Psychology says people with below average social skills aren’t less intelligent or less caring — they’re operating with a different processing speed for social information, and these 8 patterns explain why they struggle in ways that have nothing to do with effort or intention

Global English Editing

Psychology says people who measure success by inner peace instead of outer accomplishment make fundamentally different life decisions — and they’re almost never the ones seeking validation

Global English Editing

I had three close friends in my twenties and by my sixties they were all gone — not dead, just scattered by careers and kids and moves — and I’m sitting here realizing I never learned how to make new ones because I thought the first ones would last forever

Global English Editing

I’m 63 and strangers regularly guess I’m in my early fifties — but the real reason isn’t skincare or genetics, it’s that I stopped performing a version of aging that was making me exhausted and bitter

Global English Editing

Behavioral scientists found that the generation gap between boomers and millennials isn’t actually about values. It’s about emotional dialect. Both generations care deeply about family, loyalty, and hard work, but they express it in languages so different that love from one side registers as control or indifference on the other

Global English Editing

People who constantly say ‘it’s fine’ when it clearly isn’t aren’t avoiding conflict – they learned early that expressing disappointment meant being called difficult, and silence became the only response that didn’t cost them relationships

Global English Editing

Fifth (Or Later) Assvertising Campaign Dubbed ‘World’s First’

Steve Hall

RECENT ARTICLES

Lazy people who become highly disciplined often practice these 10 simple habits

People who light up every room they walk into usually display these 8 subtle behaviors

10 little things to start doing now to get ahead of everyone else in 5 years

People who are naturally quiet but highly observant usually display these 8 subtle behaviors

If a man feels proud to have you in his life, he’ll usually display these 9 behaviors

Dad Uses Hot Daughter to Sell Car on eBay

TRENDING AROUND THE WEB

Psychology says people with below average social skills aren’t less intelligent or less caring — they’re operating with a different processing speed for social information, and these 8 patterns explain why they struggle in ways that have nothing to do with effort or intention

Global English Editing

Psychology says people who measure success by inner peace instead of outer accomplishment make fundamentally different life decisions — and they’re almost never the ones seeking validation

Global English Editing

I had three close friends in my twenties and by my sixties they were all gone — not dead, just scattered by careers and kids and moves — and I’m sitting here realizing I never learned how to make new ones because I thought the first ones would last forever

Global English Editing

I’m 63 and strangers regularly guess I’m in my early fifties — but the real reason isn’t skincare or genetics, it’s that I stopped performing a version of aging that was making me exhausted and bitter

Global English Editing

Global English Editing

People who constantly say ‘it’s fine’ when it clearly isn’t aren’t avoiding conflict – they learned early that expressing disappointment meant being called difficult, and silence became the only response that didn’t cost them relationships

Global English Editing