Dance Cops Monitor CGM for Vodka Energy Drink

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Meet HI NRG, a vodka-based energy drink whose campaign site Dance Responsibly features three videos that have captured violations of our sensory rights. The breakdancing one is especially painful.

Inspired by the self-policing “drink responsibly” sash that alcohol brands are so fond of wearing, HI NRG claims to give you so much energy that it too must be had responsibly. Lest you diverge, the stern dance police will (you hope, we’re sure) whip you back into shape.

And because it wouldn’t be a legit marketing strategy without one, the site also features a CGM campaign for $3,000, almost a third lower than the going bedroom-dancing rate of $10,000, a figure that seems to fall out of CGM coffers like candy out of a big fat pinata.

Because neither the pleather-porting sex kitten cops nor the dance-themed campaign were enough of a back-decade rip-off, the drink had to call itself HI NRG too.

We really can’t think of a more devastating attempt to manifest the 90s. Wait, Alicia Silverstone just turned the corner.

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Steve Hall

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