Apparently having “unalienable rights” can mean more for the common cow than just avoiding aliens. The fine folk at Sustainable Table have launched a campaign called Cows Unite, in which our bovine buddies battle it out for organic sustainability.
Check out the Bovine Bill of Rights, which states, among other things, that cows have the right to dignity and joy. Well, hey. Unlike the citizens of most countries, they clearly know what to ask for. No wonder the aliens are always abducting them.
We wonder what cows themselves would actually have to say about how much personality we project onto them. Would they laugh? Would they demand royalties in grassy knolls? Would they become self-conscious about their spots?
