Because Those that Power Your TV Should Also Be Trusted to Power Your Pleasure

philips-intimate-massagers.jpg

Philips — the guys that probably sold you your first affordable TV and DVD player — have entered the sex toy market with Intimate Massagers.

“For couples to explore and enhance their most intimate relationship together,” the website says, in that way where they want you to think “dirty experimental sex!” while pretending to actually be referring to something you and your husband might have considered after deep thought and four intensive marital counseling sessions.

The ad at left (via) features two people in the throes of said responsible counseling activity. They appear to be composed of waves and heat. A banner on the website uses parts of this wave/heat illustration to describe how the ergy, rock-shaped massager will fill you with “feel-good” chemicals and boost your immune system.

Variations come in “intimate,” “warm intimate” and “intimate dual” — two massagers sitting inside an oyster shell. Looks like Lelo finally has a rival!

Picture of Steve Hall

Steve Hall

RECENT ARTICLES

TRENDING AROUND THE WEB

What serious readers do differently — and why it makes them better writers

What serious readers do differently — and why it makes them better writers

Global English Editing

Giving feedback on someone’s writing without damaging the relationship

Giving feedback on someone’s writing without damaging the relationship

Global English Editing

7 phrases warm-hearted people use that make others feel instantly at ease

7 phrases warm-hearted people use that make others feel instantly at ease

Hack Spirit

Why the most thoughtful people are often the slowest to give advice

Why the most thoughtful people are often the slowest to give advice

Hack Spirit

Why your first draft is supposed to be bad (and what that means for how you write)

Why your first draft is supposed to be bad (and what that means for how you write)

Global English Editing

7 things naturally curious people do that make others want to keep talking

7 things naturally curious people do that make others want to keep talking

Hack Spirit