Dear Amazon.com Customer,
As someone who purchased video games or music from genres included in the game, you might be interested in our Grand Theft Auto IV music downloads store.
This is part of an email pitch that preceded a GIGANTOR graphic inviting me to “Download music from Grand Theft Auto IV.”
Amazon, I’ve been your customer for a long time. Do you not know my name? And while we’ve got an open dialogue going, no — I’m not interested in GTA IV MP3s. I find it highly suspect that you think I would be, considering the only album I ever purchased from you is Soko’s Two, which is mostly new age fusion crap that I find very soothing and not conducive to boosting a Ferrari.
