Tanqueray Causes Verbal Diarrhea

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So Tanqueray is out with a new W + K Amsterdam-created campaign that includes TV and outdoor and in the TV spots we see just how much goes into Tanqueray and and how all that muchness translates into the making of really good cocktails that cause tickle fights in the mouth of a man meeting an ex-girlfriend in Paris along with other friends who are too cool to visit the Eiffel Tower, the Mona Lisa or the Art du Triumph (or however you spell that) and how that's all about resisting the simple because, well, they drank Tangueray which, for some reason, caused them to appear in a commercial that's actually quite beautiful but just can't stop talking about how the ingredients in Tanqueray change people's behaviors like the guy who sneaks his way backstage and causes reviewers of advertising to write the world's longest run on sentence just to further define the essence of the campiagn so everyone can fully understand it so that when they go to the liquor store for gin their only choice will be Tanqueray and the only thing they'll do after drinking Tanqueray is fly to Paris and not visit the Eiffel Tower, the Mona Lisa or the Art du Triumph and, oops, we already said that but we're running out of things to say about this commercial except to note that if they did a :60 of this commercial, we'd need to continue this article over at AdFreak, AgencySpy or Adland because we'd run out of space but oh wait that's stupid because you can't run out of space online because, well, it's not like offline media which has finite printed space but that no one reads anyway because old media is dying and new new media is where it's at which makes this entire statement moot so here we are back talking about that Tanqueray commercial that has such amazing ingredients that it makes people do strange things like visit Paris and not visit the Eiffel Tower, the Mona Lisa or the Art du Triumph and, oops, we already said that but we're running out of things to say about this commercial except to note that...it's time to shut the fuck up about this fucking commercial.

by Steve Hall    Jul- 2-09    
Topic: Brands, Campaigns, Commercials, Creative Commentary, Outdoor



Seriously. Flying Really Is This Metaphysical

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If flying was actually this metaphysical, mundane details such as legroom and baggage check fees would be irrelevant. But, it's not and that's why this new work for Swiss Air leaves us with a big, "Huh?"

Created by Publicis Zurich, written and directed (and voiced) by Marc Forster ("Quantum of Solace," "Finding Neverland," "Monster's Ball") and edited by Cut + Run, the spot aims to describe "modern day travel via air.

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by Steve Hall    Jul- 1-09    
Topic: Commercials, Creative Commentary, Strange



Audrina Patridge Likes More Than Just A Piece of Meat

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Back in June, we noted The Hills babe Audrina Patridge would soon make her debut in a Carl's Jr. commercial. That day has arrived. In the commercial, we get to hear how Audrina has to give up "like everything" to look as hot as she does in a bikini. But the one thing she won't give up is the Carl's Jr. Teriyaki Burger with which she's "totally obsessed" and cuz, ya know, she has to be "a little bad."

While Barbara Lippert says she "appreciate(s) that it's a somewhat more natural setup than having Paris Hilton hose down a luxury car while sucking and licking the burger on all fours," we still think the Paris Hilton spot was the best Carl's Jr. commercial ever. Bikini + soapy water + famous socialite in her prime = gold.

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by Steve Hall    Jun-24-09    
Topic: Brands, Commercials, Creative Commentary, Opinion, Racy



Spastic Jump Cuts Ruin Wells Fargo Commercials

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Maybe it's our short attention span. Maybe it's our overly simplistic mind. Maybe it's our aversion to creative full of distracting hack job jumble cuts and irrelevant metaphors. Whatever it is, we had to watch these two DDB West-created, Epoch Films-produced Wells Fargo commercials a few times before we realized they touted the organization's online banking services and automatic savings programs.

Come one Epoch! You guys did that awesome JCPenney commercial. Granted you submitted it illegally to Cannes last year but still. Who got their hands on this Wells Fargo work? Your interns?

by Steve Hall    Jun-22-09    
Topic: Bad, Campaigns, Commercials, Creative Commentary



Entertainment Weekly Bows 'Advertisement of Seismic Proportions'

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Hopping right on the "we'll do anything to increase ad revenue" bus, Entertainment Weekly is out with Andy's Richter Scale, an advertorial on the magazine's Must List page pimping the Conan O'Brien show, Andy Richter himself and HBO's True Blood. Wait, what's this ad for again?

Whatever the ad may be for, we love the riff on vampires which ends with, "And have you ever noticed that their real-life fans are ust renaissance fair types with substance abuse problems?"

As advertorials go, it's a good one. So good, it took us three days to realize it wasn't just an editorial sidebar to the Must List. But one wonders. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

by Steve Hall    Jun-15-09    
Topic: Creative Commentary, Magazine, Opinion



Wait, This Isn't A Sony Commercial?

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Well, at least it isn't a stupid sunglass toss. This new Cutwater-created work for Ray Ban borrows significantly from Sony Paint but, aside from that, we do like the colorific, Matrix-like style slomotasticness of it. Don't blink though or you'll miss the Never Hide tagline at the end.

But, really. Who cares about that anymore? After all, we can't make ads that looks like ads anymore, right? Only cool stuff that tries really hard not to be advertising and that pretends to be something else while at the same time making every effort to make sure everyone actually does realize it's advertising while hiding the fact it...oh we could go on forever explaining this tactic.

Just watch and enjoy.

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by Steve Hall    Jun-12-09    
Topic: Commercials, Creative Commentary



Yo T-Dog. Me And The Homies Went Rollin' Down to Chi Lake

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OK, so Chicago Lake liquors is an "urban" liquor store with low prices. Why? Because "urban" people can't afford higher prices? Because suburban white people are cheap and have no problem traveling to "urban" space to get their freak on? Because you can never get enough Crystal or Hennessy?

Aside from all those potential cause group-style alarm bells, this campaign for Chicago Lake Liquors from Brew is not afraid to go all Vanilla Ice on us with every over-done white-guy-goes-black tactic in the book.

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by Steve Hall    Jun-10-09    
Topic: Campaigns, Commercials, Creative Commentary, Good



New York Pizza and Italian Stereotypes Envision Rollergirl

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New York Pizza, which is not in New York, is out with another strange commercial just in time to be compared to the recent Miller commercial, featuring Sopranos actor Frank Vincent, which was derided for perpetuating Italian stereotypes. In the commercial, we see the stereotypical mafioso type who's "got other businesses" envision a "Damn Hot" promotion that, in the end, doesn't go so well.

After surprising a little boy, pleasing dad and shocking mom, New York Pizza's Rollergirl gets lost, hangs with prostitutes and ultimately gets arrested. At which time our mafioso character concludes, "Eh, bad idea" and realizes all that matters is a "damn tasty pizza and a damn cheap price."

by Steve Hall    Jun- 5-09    
Topic: Commercials, Creative Commentary, Strange



T-Mobile Wackos Give Trees Paperless Pelvic Thrusts

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Yup. The whole flashmob/spontaneous dance party thing has jumped the shark. Actually, it jumped the shark long, long ago but T-Mobile is confirming every last shark has been jumped with its Tree Rave.

In Tree Rave, unsuspecting park dwellers are assaulted by hired freaks who, upon placement of a boom box (they still make those?), break out into a really bad tree dance causing onlookers to offer up classic WTF looks as they wonder whether or not they should grab their kids and run far, far away from these tree hugging wackos

by Steve Hall    Jun- 3-09    
Topic: Bad, Brands, Commercials, Creative Commentary, Strange



Denver Egotist Takes Stand Against Brand Molestation.

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"The big, fat, silver torpedo that is the Chipotle burrito is as iconic (in this city, anyway) as an Absolut bottle or a Converse shoe," lauds the Denver Egotist, bringing to mind billboards that have taken us by surprise more than once.

"So what better way to start off a brand new campaign than to ditch the thing you're most famous for in favor of a bland, new Taco Bell-styled menu and some insipid value statements that are saturating the market in this shitty economy. Oh, and how about a new logo, too? Something that could sit nicely on the shelf at Target with the other Archer Farms produce?"

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