Yellow Stickies Got Our Intern A Job In Advertising

A former Adrants intern just found her first full time job in advertising and wrote to tell us how she got the job.

"Hey there. So after the awesome internship with you guys, my friend Tim told me he just got a job at an agency and, just like you always said, practically all the work he does has to do with sex. So you know I've only been out of college for a while and all I've been doing is clubbing, drinking and fighting off guys who only want me for sex :-) Seriously! What's up with that? It's not like I have a sign on me that says, 'Free orgasm. Insert here!' I mean, you know I'm nice looking but still! That doesn't mean any guy can just climb on top of me, groan like an animal for 60 seconds and then just roll over. I mean come one. I have a college degree! I'm not just a repository for a guy's pent up urgencies whenever his need arises.

Anyway, so when Tim told me about his job and that there was an opening at the company, I begged him to see if he could set up an interview for me. I'm not sure he was listening to me when I was talking to him because all he was doing was staring at my boobs - like you all always did - but I guess he must have heard something because I did get the interview. This dude, Felix, called and said he could see me on a Tuesday morning so I started to think about what I was going to do to prepare, what I was going to say and what I was going to wear. Since Tim did tell me advertising was all about sex, I figured it would be smart and give me an advantage if I dressed the part. So, I went through my closet and tried on a bunch of my little skirts and tops but it all just seemed really lame just to get a job.

I needed a hook. Something to get me noticed. Something that was kinda professional but kinda sexy too. Then I was like damn, yellow stickies! They must use yellow stickies in advertising so I ran out and bought a whole bunch and brought them back to my apartment. I took all my clothes off and started to stick the stickies all over me trying to make some kind of outfit Felix would think was kinda cool since I was dressing like all those hot girls in the ads he makes. I asked Tim to come over and tell me what looked good and how I should place the stickies but, just like a typical guy, all he did was drool. I told him to go to the bathroom and cool off which he did though it didn't sound like that was all he was doing.

Anyway, on Tuesday morning, I headed over to meet with Felix. I didn't think the rest of the word would understand why all I was wearing was stickies so I put a big sweater on until I was waiting outside Felix's office where I took it off. Everyone in the office was staring at me and whispering. I mean I guess I looked pretty weird but I thought this would be normal to them because all they do everyday is create ads with sex in them. I thought I'd be nothing special. I really didn't understand why everyone was staring. The guys seemed to be very interested though.

After a few minutes, Felix came out of his office to get me and he looked as shocked as everyone else. I still didn't get it but I was hoping this was a good thing because Tim kept telling me advertising was all about sex and I was trying to be as sexy as I could be so Felix would know I new the business. We talked for a few minutes and then Felix asked if he could take a few pictures. He told me he always took pictures so he could remember all the people he interviews so I stood up for him. I moved a few of the stickies around to make sure I looked my most memorable.

As Felix took the pictures, I could tell he was starting to look like all those guys in the clubs that always wanted to have sex with me which I thought was really odd. I mean if advertising deals with sex all the time, you'd think these guys would be able to control themselves. It all made me kinda nervous but I didn't say anything because I just wanted him to like me and give me the job. I guess my stunt worked because Felix did ask me back for a second interview. Oddly, he asked me to wear an actual skirt to the next interview. I still don't get that but I guess it doesn't matter because he hired me.

It's been a month or so now and I still haven't quite figured out what he's going to have me do. Right now, he has me coming into his office like 10 times a day to bend over and pick up this pile of papers he always has on the ground and then climb up this ladder to file the papers in this really cool, glass-floored loft he has above his desk. He's always leaning back in his chair, talking on the phone and watching me while I file. Is this just what everyone has to do during their first year in advertising? Hopefully, I'll get to do some real work someday. Anyway, thanks for the internship. It definitely helped. Felix reads Adrants every day."

Written by Steve Hall    Comments (28)     File: Spoofs     Jul-16-07